Dirty Sexy Money

Ep.

Title

Air/Pub'l

Grade

Author

2-14
Weecap

Simon Says...

The Bad Guy - A lot of stuff happens that doesn't matter as Simon reveals the mysterious plot threads over the course of the episode -- which happens to be the worst series finale in the history of television. Or somewhere close to that.

08.08.2009
08.11.2009
D+

DeAnn Welker

2-13
Weecap

Brotherly Love

The Unexpected Arrival - There's a whole lot of drama involving Simon, Karen, Nola, Jeremy, Patrick and Congressman Watley. But, as usual, the relationship between half-brothers Nick and Brian makes the episode worth watching.

08.01.2009
08.04.2009
C+

DeAnn Welker

2-12
Weecap

Hurtling Toward the End

The Convertible - Nick wants his daughter back, Brian wants sex with his ex, Karen wants a baby, Simon wants Jeremy to kill him and Tripp wants to control the Senate. None of those things happen by the end of the episode, but we still have two episodes left.

07.25.2009
07.28.2009
B

DeAnn Welker

2-11
Weecap

And Then Nothing Happened

The Facts - This is that episode that was supposed to air a long time ago but was bumped. The reason that didn't hurt the continuity of the show was because everything that happens in the episode turns out to be figments of Clark's imagination by the end. I feel cheated.

07.18.2009
07.20.2009
D

DeAnn Welker

2-10
Weecap

Five Weeks Later...

The Organ Donor - We jump ahead to the fallout from the shooting at Patrick's inauguration. Someone's dead, someone's in a coma, and one Darling even has "amnesia." There's other fallout, too, as Lisa decides to take Nick to court in their divorce to get full custody of Kiki.

12.17.2008
12.22.2008
C

DeAnn Welker

2-9
Weecap

Oh, Shoot!

The Plan - Ellen’s brother, Chase, returns with the same issues as before: wanting justice. And then he completely goes out of character and becomes a vengeance-seeking homicidal maniac. It’s not good. Fortunately, a couple decent storylines -- involving Brian and Patrick, of course -- show up in this episode to keep us interested.

12.10.2008
12.12.2008
B-

DeAnn Welker

2-8
Weecap

What Wedding

The Summer House - The title of this show used to be ironic, in that it managed to find the poignant, meaningful stuff behind these outwardly vapid characters. Not anymore. This season, vapid is the new meaningful, convoluted is the new sleek, and stupid is the new smart.

12.03.2008
12.05.2008
D

DeAnn Welker

2-6
Weecap

Just When You Think It Can't Get Any Worse...

The Injured Party - ...It does. Nick halfheartedly chooses Lisa, but then loses her. Lisa gets in a girl fight with Karen. Karen continues her ridiculous relationship with Simon. Simon is some sort of kidnapper, holding Nola's brother hostage. Nola gets Patrick to do whatever she wants and then he thanks her for it. Tripp falls in love with a 20-something named Wrenn whom Letitia hits with her car. And then Nick and Wrenn totally kiss. It's totally unexpected. But not in a good way.

11.19.2008
11.21.2008
D

DeAnn Welker

2-5
Weecap

The Players Get Played

The Verdict - Jeremy gets his mom's charges dropped, Nick gets Tripp to take everything (her shares, her inheritance) away from Karen, Brian finds out Andrea has known she's had cancer for a year, and Simon's working with Nola although it's not exactly clear just what they're after.

11.05.2008
11.07.2008
C

DeAnn Welker

2-4
Weecap

Stupid Is as Karen Does

The Silence - First, Karen is a moron. Also, everyone is telling everyone else's secrets this week, and the only "silence" we end up with is from a character we've never seen before and will probably never see again. And, because it cannot be said enough, Karen is a moron.

10.29.2008
10.31.2008
C+

DeAnn Welker

2-3
Weecap

Everyone Has the Weepies

The Star Witness - Nick's weepy because his mom left him 30 years ago, Brian's sad because his son's in Brazil, Letitia wishes Nick knew she's always loved him, Patrick misses Carmelita and hates lying, Karen and Lisa both realize they've lost the Nick they loved, and Jeremy and Nola hang out with the actual Weepies.

10.22.2008
10.24.2008
A

DeAnn Welker

2-2
Weecap

Don’t, Tripp!

The Family Lawyer - Karen’s in love, and Jeremy might be too. But the objects of their affection are out to screw the family in one way or another. Patrick delivers a touching eulogy, but it’s to Carmelita. Nick and Brian have brotherly bonding time in jail. And Tripp turns out to be the villain of the story.

10.08.2008
10.09.2008
A-

DeAnn Welker

2-1
Weecap

Family Lies

The Birthday Present - The Darlings throw a party for Nick, at which everyone is awkward and uncomfortable with each other. They give him a boat. Then we flash back and learn why everyone is awkward. Unfortunately, we also re-learn everything we learned last year.

10.01.2008
10.02.2008
B

DeAnn Welker

1-11
Recap

Dirtier Sexier...Money-er?

Unaired Pilot - There were no punches pulled in the original pilot of DSM.

01.14.2008
01.15.2008
B+

Couch Baron

1-10
Recap

Joint Therapy

The Nutcracker - Lisa and Jeremy get stoned together, and Lisa gets fired, but it might be good for her in the end. Karen is playing Elder, but her heart might be getting in the way. And Brian leaves the church and comes to work for Tripp.

12.04.2007
12.09.2007
B

Couch Baron

1-9
Recap

Brotherly...Um, Love?

The Watch - Nick and Brian share a dead father. And we'll all be dead from crying after Brian and Brian Jr. are forcibly separated.

11.27.2007
12.03.2007
B+

Couch Baron

1-8
Recap

I Won't Find It Fantastic Or Think It Absurd

The Country House - With the writer's strike in full swing, Anton Chekhov was brought back to script an episode where hunting rifles are introduced in one scene and unloaded in another. Ellen Darling finally loses patience with Patrick's dalliance with Carmelita, so she pops a cap in her husband's knee. And that's about the fourth most dramatic thing that happens during an overnight trip to the Darling's country house.

11.20.2007
11.26.2007
B+

Djb

1-7
Recap

Bye Bye Birdie

The Wedding - Oh, you try making a good golf joke. Freddy leaves us, richer in funds but poorer in...something, and Karen decides to stop kidding around and go after Nick. Also, Elder keeps driving wedges (look at that!) between Pat and Tripp, and Tripp is raaaaather displeased about it.

11.13.2007
11.17.2007
B

Couch Baron

1-6
Recap

"I Love You, Nicky"

The Game - That's what Tripp tells Nick, and boy, does he prove it.

10.30.2007
11.03.2007
B+

Couch Baron

1-5
Recap

Off With Her Head!

The Bridge - Well, that's the punishment Juliet would probably prescribe for Natalie, as it turns out Natalie isn't pregnant. The good news is that the twins reconcile, though. Also, Nick chats with Simon Elder.

10.23.2007
10.28.2007
B

Couch Baron

1-4
Recap

Pick A Kid, Any Kid

The Chiavennasca - One of the Darling kids isn't Tripp's but Dutch's, but we don't find out which one yet. What we do find out is that Karen can be awfully bitchy, Simon Elder actually exists, and Natalie is pregnant. Really.

10.16.2007
10.20.2007
B-

Couch Baron

1-3
Recap

"Hey, Condy!"

The Italian Banker - Donald Sutherland actually says that. Sure, there's intrigue involving a sex tape and a catfight, but it's the one-liners that steal this episode. Plus: Rebecca Colfax, Family Publicist!

10.09.2007
10.13.2007
A

Couch Baron

1-2
Recap

Family Politics

The Lions - Patrick doesn't want to run for Senate, but Tripp convinces him to for the sake of the family. Jeremy tries to stay loyal to Juliet, but succumbs to temptation. Brian takes in his bastard son. And Nick basically accuses Tripp of killing his dad, leading to the best-acted scene of the series so far.

10.02.2007
10.07.2007
A

Couch Baron

1-1
Recap

SECRETS AND LIES!

Pilot - Whoops, that's something else. But there are a lot of those in the Kennedy-esque Darling family, as Peter Krause finds out when he takes over from his dead dad as their family lawyer.

09.25.2007
09.28.2007
B+

Couch Baron

1-1
Extra

Times, They Are A-Changin'...

The Candis Cayne Interview - ...as evidenced by transsexual Candis Cayne playing a transsexual role on Dirty Sexy Money. Find out what she had to say about it.

09.07.2007
09.08.2007

Couch Baron

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