Somehow, this episode choked a hell of an hour out of the logline "Everybody goes to meetings." Tripp lures Simon Elder up to the Darling country house so that he can ask Simon about his intentions with Patrick. Patrick seems to be explaining his intentions to a lot of people this week, as his wife's request to meet with Carmelita comes to fruition. The three of them share a tense meeting wherein Ellen sets some simple ground rules for her husband's dalliances with his she-friend, basically splitting up his time like it's a hideous custody battle. And for those of you interested in an actual hideous custody battle: lucky for you there's one of those going on across town as well. Brian and Laura Palmer (what's her character's name again...meh, it's only the recaplet) face off for custody of Brian Jr., and a few instances of Brian's parental negligence come to light, such as the whole making-the-kid-pretend-he's-a-Scandinavian-orphan thing. Convinced that he's not going to win custody by legitimate means, Brian takes the next step: bribing the hell out of anyone who could possibly help him. And up at the country house, Tripp tells Simon Elder and us that he thinks Simon has a grudge against the family because Dutch got Simon's parents deported to Siberia. Love that twist. Couldn't have been expecting it less. What else, what else? Karen's attempt to woo Nick takes a major step forward now that Letitia is involved. At the country house, the matriarch corners Lisa and "accidentally" "slips" that Karen kissed Nate at last week's wedding. Lisa freaks out and leaves, taking solace at her parents' house on the evening before Thanksgiving. In other news, Jeremy takes on a new, awesome name so that he can woo an exotic lady friend he doesn't want to find out he is a Darling. And Juliet didn't show up this week, because her character must have gone to rehab without the show remembering to tell us.
Previously on The Show For People Who Liked Arrested Development But Thought It Was A Little Too Funny: Karen loves Nick, Brian loves his son, Patrick loves a lady-man, Tripp loves Darling Plaza, and Jeremy used to have a twin. But that was a long, long time ago.
New York City! Cheesecake shots of the skyline remind us that it's a fabulous city for the superrich and even the Nick George rich. The rest of you can stand in line to buy a Metrocard and follow my ass on the F train out to Brooklyn. ["WOOOOOO! F train out to Brooklyn!" -- Miss Alli]
It's morning in Manhattan, and Nick and Lisa lie in bed talking about paint. She asks him if he's ready to paint the living room, and he responds with sarcasm, "Yeah, I love painting. I love the mess, I love the smell." Lisa laughs for what will probably be the last time in their entire relationship, and then asks what color he likes better, holding up paint chips and giving him the choice between "crème brulee or flan." And as delicious as those walls sound, I can't help but think that, no matter which one Nick chooses, Lisa is going to paint the entire room in "I'm-Mad-About-Something-Karen-Darling-Did Blue." But right now it's all smiles and good vibes, as Lisa nicely sets up the episode for us: "Are you sure you're going to be able to finish this before Thanksgiving at my parents'? It's only two days." Nick responds with characteristic early episode naivety, noting that he has very little to do today other than a meeting with Tripp and some quick work on Brian's custody hearing, and that's it for the entire holiday weekend. I wonder if Nick will get sucked into the lives of the Darlings, sacrifice his and his family's plans, piss off Lisa when she makes some sudden and shocking discovery about Nick and Karen, and then have her tell him that she wants to work it out because she knows her husband really loves her. I'm just guessing, but I feel like we've seen this episode before.
Over at Tripp's office, Nick updates his boss on the status of Darling Plaza: the deed was transferred to Simon Elder two weeks ago, and Nick remains in the dark about Elder's plans for it. Tripp once more rhapsodizes on the meaning of Darling Plaza: it's where his kids were raised, it's where he truly felt at home, it's where Dylan went electric for the first time, it's the filming location for the fake moon landing, and so on. Just the kind of place one wouldn't think to bet away capriciously in a poker game. Conversation turns to Patrick, to whom Tripp tells Nick he hasn't spoken since the wedding. Tripp sits and tells Nick he has no idea what it's like to come to the end of a long and successful life only to have all of his achievements "spirited away by this capricious man." Sometimes it's nice to have a reminder of why I love this show so much, such as when there are lines like, "spirited away by this capricious man." It makes me miss writers. Remember them? Nick tells Tripp that, despite any political alliance Patrick may have with Simon Elder, he is still Tripp's son. OR IS HE? In the madcap world of Dirty Sexy Money, anyone on this show could or could not be Tripp's son at any time. Even Carmelita.