Dirty Sexy Money

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B | Grade It Now!
Bye Bye Birdie

I know I've complained about the overabundance of New York shots, but the ones with which they start this episode off are spectacular -- a series of dawn shots in which the city looks its most beautiful. Which is fitting, because YOU GUYS IT'S THE WEDDING EPISODE OH MY GOD. Anyhow, the bride- and groom-to-be-or-not-to-be are canoodling in bed. Freddy wonders if doing each other on the big day is bad luck, or something, and Karen replies that since she just banged one of her exes and is in love with another one, little things like superstition aren't really likely to matter. Or something. I'm just glad that if they're going to make me say goodbye to Freddy, they're giving me some beefcake shots as parting gifts. As they smooch some more, Karen wonders what that tradition is all about, anyway. In a brilliant little bit of camerawork, the angle switches to behind their heads, so when they pull apart, we see Brian's been sitting at the foot of the bed the whole time. Hee.

Brian tells them that the tradition is about symbolically seeing your beloved anew, and then wonders if they've given any thought to their vows at all. Freddy suggests a golf theme to their attestations (I love him, but trust me, you don't want to know), which Karen puts paid to with a typical head-shake; she says all they need is the simple "have and hold" stuff, plus "a little open bar." Given that it's her fourth wedding, you'd think she'd want to avoid the appearance of boilerplating, but that will be irrelevant soon enough, I suppose. Brian: "As your brother, I agree -- no one cares what you say." Hee. This show was only off for a week, right? I can't believe how much I missed it. He goes on that as Karen's minister, however, he's obliged to honor their "[appropriately skeptical tone] eternal union." Karen, seemingly thrown by Brian's phrasing, licenses him to write what he wants, as long as it's short, and he tells them he'll see them in seven hours. Karen looks like she's going to be physically ill, which makes Freddy's fratty declaration that they're "in it to win it" all the more ill-timed.

Patrick is giving an open-air press conference and gets a question about how earlier that day, his office indicted "one of the city's biggest real-estate developers, the Fantini brothers," on multiple counts of fraud and other misconduct. Patrick gives some answer about being tough on something or other, prompting another reporter to ask if he isn't worried that taking on "Michael and Sal" Fantini will bring him into conflict with Tripp. Another canned answer leads us to...

...Letitia, who's poring over the seating chart and sighing to a just-appearing Karen that "the ambassador" decided to bring a date at the last minute. I just hate the way those guys abuse their diplomatic immunity. Karen unceremoniously tells Letitia she's having second thoughts; after denying they have anything to do with Nick, she informs Letitia in regard to Freddy, "He's not exactly, um...complicated?" While I'm sure there were innumerable layers to his caddy. Letitia sighs that Karen is just like Tripp in that she's a hopeless romantic, which...wasn't she just a few episodes ago accusing Tripp of being cold and unfeeling? Something like "God forbid Tripp Darling feel anything," maybe? Anyway, Letitia goes on about real romanticism being the ability to wake up every day and tell your partner "I choose you," which continues to be more than a little odd coming from her, as Karen is both quick and succinct in pointing out. Letitia somewhat breezily says that having two lovers was her mistake, and really, this scene for me is kind of off from soup to nuts, but maybe I'm overthinking it. Then again, I haven't been known to be exactly complicated either.

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Dirty Sexy Money




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