Lisa, bags packed, storms down the steps of the country house, saying that she's off to her parents' house. Nick says that the only reason he didn't tell her was because he didn't want to fight over what was basically a peck on the cheek: "Her lips, my cheek." He says that he can't make Karen stop behaving this way, and Lisa asks if that's the excuse he'll use when they sleep together. He tries to tell her that Karen is delusional, and Lisa says that she's sensing a pattern that she thinks Nick is now a part of. She was never worried before (she wasn't?), but she has to admit that she is now. Maybe she could give Karen one night every other week and one Saturday night a month. I'm sure that will work out fine for Patrick and Ellen.
Oh, speaking of which. Patrick gets into bed with Ellen and tries to engage her in conversation, but Ellen cuts him off: "You went to see her, didn't you?" Patrick cops to the fact that Carmelita is in a motel near the country house, and Ellen asks if he at least took a shower. He tells her that he didn't do anything icky like that, but instead that it's been a rough night and that he needed to talk to someone. He ill-advisedly adds, "I can tell her things." Ellen leaves the room in a big hurry, because there's putting your foot in your mouth and then there's telling your wife, "I really relate to my hot tranny mistress."
Downstairs, Letitia notes to Tripp that Simon left in a hurry. Tripp says the meeting was wearying and that sometimes he's almost ready to leave this life. Letitia, rather than being all, "Foreshadowing your death much?" tells Tripp that she's glad he married her. He agrees. And then, a gunshot. Tripp, Letitia, Karen, and Nick all run upstairs to find Patrick shot in the leg, and Ellen holding the hunting rifle. Guess this is what we call "the third act."
The next day, outside of a hospital, Nick talks to the press about the "simple, run-of-the-mill hunting accident" that took place up at the country house. When asked who actually pulled the trigger, Nick lays the blame on "Charlie Bickelson, a longtime Darling family friend" who is devastated by what he did. Even though he didn't do it, and is possibly fake. The press asks where Ellen Darling is, and Nick says that she is resting at the Imperial Hotel. Nick wraps up the press conference by saying he hopes that everyone can put this behind them as soon as possible.