Doctor Who
Army Of Ghosts (1)

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B+ | 2 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Et In Arcadia Ego

They head through a doorway and into a huge factory floor full of artifacts and scientists working on them. "It was only a matter of time until you found us," says Yvonne, "and at last you've made it. I'd like to welcome you, Doctor. Welcome...to Torchwood." The Doctor identifies a Jathar Sunglider, which apparently "came down to Earth off the Shetland Islands ten years ago." He asks if it crashed, Yvonne shakes her head: "No, we shot it down. It violated our airspace. Then we stripped it bare. The weapon that destroyed the Sycorax on Christmas Day? That was us!" Neither Jackie nor the Doctor is pleased to hear about that one. "The Torchwood Institute has a motto: 'If it's alien, it's ours.' Anything that comes from the sky, we strip it down and we use it. For the good of the British Empire." Jackie protests that there isn't a British Empire; Yvonne nods: "Not yet." Yvonne borrows a gun from a soldier named Sebastian, and the Doctor stares: "That's a particle gun." Yvonne jerks it away from Jackie's hands and ignores her: "Took us eight years to get it to work," she says, proudly. "We must defend our border against the alien." She gives it back and asks the soldier's name: "I think it's very important to know everyone by name. Torchwood is a very modern organization. People skills, that's what it's all about these days." Smiling smugly: "I'm a people person." Jackie rolls her eyes. The Doctor asks if there's anybody named Alonzo working there. There isn't. Yvonne finally gives up her name, as the Doctor pulls a large device from a box: "Ah, yes. Now, we're rather fond of these. The Magnaclamp. Found in a spaceship buried at the base of Mount Snowdon. Attach this to an object and it cancels the mass. I could use it to lift two tons of weight with a single hand. That's an imperial ton, by the way. Torchwood refuses to go metric..." (Except like three seconds ago when she measured the ghost energy in gigawatts.) Jackie grins and notes that she could use a Magnaclamp to carry her shopping, and Yvonne is both patronizing and irrelevant: "All these devices are for Torchwood's benefit. Not the general public's." Whatever. The Doctor looks through a magnifying glass and asks about the ghosts. They're a side effect, Yvonne says, but not of what: "All in good time, Doctor. There is an itinerary, trust me."

Men drive the TARDIS through the factory floor on a large truck. "If it's alien, it's ours." The Doctor assures Yvonne that she'll never get inside it, and Yvonne is arrogant and whatever. As the Doctor watches the TARDIS pass, Rose opens the door a crack and peeks through. The Doctor nods at her encouragingly, and looks away. In the Doctor's coat pockets, bigger on the inside, Rose rummages for the psychic paper. Finding it, she grins, thinking of all the ways she can use it.

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Doctor Who

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