Doctor Who
Bad Wolf (1)

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A | 1 USERS: A+
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The guard opens the gate. "Let's do it," says the Doctor. And they do. All three leap to their feet: Jack punching and just actually throwing people, the Doctor knocking guards out, all grabbing weapons, heading upstairs. The male programmer realizes that there might be a problem now.

Jack, Lynda, and the Doctor pile into the lift and head for Floor 500, where the male programmer sets off an alarm: "Clear the floor! He's on his way up here. With a gun!" The Doctor takes the safety off his gun. He is unrecognizable.

The girl programmer begs the Controller to close the elevator shaft, and reminds the staff again that there will be solar flare activity coming soon. "Never mind solar flares! He's gonna kill you!" shouts the male programmer. And the elevator opens, and out step our heroes, armed wildly, looking scary, about to take everybody down. The Doctor can only see the Controller. Jack shouts orders to the staff, scattering them to the sides of the room. The Doctor shouts up at the Controller: "Who's in charge of this place?" She counts the seconds until she is free, doesn't even look down. The Doctor: "This Satellite's more than a Gamestation." The Controller continues to count. The Doctor demands to know who killed Rose Tyler. The Controller reminds the staff that solar flares will commence shortly. The Doctor screams at her for answers.

The male programmer tells the Doctor that the Controller can't reply, and the Doctor swings around on him, making the whole staff shrink away in a mix of what I'm guessing is 60% the gun, 40% his very scary face. The male programmer begs him not to shoot, and the Doctor calls him "thick." "Like I was ever gonna shoot," the Doctor says, and he tosses the gun to the shocked male programmer. The Doctor tells "Captain" Jack to secure the exits against more security. He turns back to the male programmer, and asks him to continue. "But I've got your gun," the kid says, mystified. The Doctor tells him, "Okay, so shoot me. Why can't she answer?" The male programmer stammers for awhile, distracted by the BFG, and finally asks the Doctor whether he can put it down. "The Controller is linked to the transmissions," the male programmer says. "The entire output goes through her brain -- you're not a member of staff, so she doesn't recognize your existence." Something fictional. She doesn't have a name. The programmer continues, "She was installed when she was five years old. That's the only life she's ever known." And yet, this grace. Jack calls out to the Doctor that they're sealed in and safe for about ten minutes. "But that stuff you were saying," says the male programmer. "About something going on with the Gamestation: I think you're right. Unauthorized transmats...it's been going on for years." The Doctor asks him to show them, as Captain Jack's wrist tech notices the TARDIS behind the door to Archive Six. As he heads for the door, the lady programmer makes him jump a little bit: "You're not allowed in there! Archive Six is out of bounds!" Which: welcome to Cathica 2.0. Have you not realized that things are shit crazy? Jack brandishes his guns, which are slung bandolero-style across his chest: "Do I look like an out-of-bounds sort of guy?" Not sure about the dialogue, but the visual is supremely bad-ass.

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Doctor Who

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