The wedding guests loiter and chat outside, still waiting on the bride. Sonny comes out with a gigantic mobile phone, the brick kind, and complains on it that half the guests still haven't arrived, and just like he thought, the whole thing's a disaster in the making, et cetera. People pass him into the church as he's saying, "No, in this case, 'knocked her up' is a phrase I'd use," and then the Bell message repeats on his phone, as well. (I thought "to knock up" meant something different in Britain.) Sonny doesn't get the weirdness, just hangs up, and then a car covered in ribbons arrives. Stuart comes out to grab Sonny, saying that it's bad luck to see Sarah before the wedding so they have to get inside, and Sonny says it's already bad luck:"This day is cursed." I admit to not knowing all the details, but Sonny pretty much seems like a dick. I wonder if Stuart loves him anyway -- if he'd risk everything to save him, say. In spite of it. If he's old enough to see the man inside his father. Stuart puts his hand over his eyes and goes back inside, Sonny following after.
The car stops, and out steps Sarah Clarke. And her teeth. Her scary British friends yak and yak about "that's what I call a meringue," and how they should drive around the block a few times so that everybody can see her get out of the car. They talk about all the guests that are still missing, and Sarah's train detaches from her dress. She starts to complain that she should have used Velcro, and out of the car steps...Miss Jackie Tyler, hair up to here, '80s jewelry, looking like a million bucks as ever, shouting about all manner of things: "I'm here, stop your belly-aching. Take Rose a sec, will ya?" I Heart Jackie, dude. She tosses little Rose over to one of the friends, and they talk about how lovely she is, and how unworthy is her father. Jackie calls him a "useless article."
Rose and her dad come around the corner, the hit-and-run loop tossing the killer car in front of them like it's going to have to kill Pete either way, like time's stalking him, and Rose shouts, "Dad!" They swerve and come to a stop before the church. Pete turns around, and notices that it's the same car as before, as Rose shakes and stares in the passenger seat. They get out and shake it off, Pete noticing that the killer car has disappeared altogether, and that Rose is standing around, looking nervous. He looks right at Rose: "You called me 'Dad.' What did you say that for?" Saved by the Jackie, who comes running up with baby Rose and screaming at Pete, calling him "the accident waiting to happen." Not funny. Rose stares at her mother, who continues to nag at her husband that he'd be late for his own funeral, and how it nearly was. Not funny, not funny, not funny.