Doctor Who
Doctor Who

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 994 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
I Am Trying To Break Your Heart

Could it be the universe talking? It's something fictional, this universe; it's made up of words on a page -- a script -- so I don't see why there couldn't be words speaking everywhere, like Danny the Street. Or like the show itself is Charlotte, weaving little warnings out of itself. Maybe it's a warning, and not an entity? "Some Pig! Bad Wolf!" Maybe the mistake is in thinking that the Jagrafess Ninety Years Of Stupitude is connected at all. A story with time travel in it probably has all kinds of little rips and tears in the continuum -- look at this episode. And anyway. That seems a little high-concept even for old RTD. Well, no, that's exactly what I would have done in college -- let the story interrogate itself from the inside to prove how very clever I was -- so it's possible. I take it back. And that bums me out anyway, because if it's the show talking to us, we've got a month left before it clears its throat and tells it plain, going by episode titles. My current hunch is that the Bad Wolf is related to, or responsible for, the ninety-year issue and who knows what else, and it's connected to Rose, I think, but not the Doctor, because the Doctor has his own "this is my burden" bullshit, and if it's related to a fuck-up, that'll be Rose. Or else there's still another player out there -- we're only halfway through, basically, and all the guys so far with that kind of firepower are gone, right? Well, no, but the Moxx made it sound like Crisis, like it was a collapsing-multiverse thing, which makes it seem more like a Time War issue. And he was saying it to the Face of Boe, who was pregnant on the Bad Wolf channel, so that's twice for him. Hmm. The only thing that would bug me is if it's something we've not seen at all, and this is all just backtracking from some episode-specific bullshit to make that single episode more awesome. Like that it relates to a monster that eats farting lint, and Rose tried to warn her past self about the farting lint-eating monster, but alas, too much was lost in translation, so now the farting lint monster is huffing and puffing and farting and eating all the other parts of the multiverse like so much lint. Well, I'm talking out of my ass again, and I promised not to do that. (...And this time I swear I won't! Heh.)

Doctor Who

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