Doctor Who
New Earth

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B- | 6 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Still My Happening, Still Freaks Me Out

The Doctor and Cassandra are looking at the hospital's floor plan; the Doctor's still bitching about the lack of a shop. Cassandra: "No, it's missing something else. When I was downstairs, those Nurse-Cat-Nuns were talking about Intensive Care. Where is it?" The Doctor looks around and agrees: "You're right, well done." He takes his sonic screwdriver out as she advises him to "search the subframe" and, if it's locked, "try the installation protocol..." And he doesn't notice that she's got the information for herself, but then he sonics the whole wall open; without sparing a look back, Cassandra heads in, and the Doctor notes that something's off. "Intensive Care," he hums. "Certainly looks intensive." Novice Hame follows them, unseen.

The Doctor and Cassandra find themselves in the huge ICU cavern, looking at all the rows of green glowing doors. The Doctor finally sonics one open; a man covered in boils stares back at them out of smoke. "That's disgusting," hisses Cassandra. "What's wrong with him?" The Doctor says sincerely, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Pity is the Bad Wolf of the season. Cassandra holds her nose, while the Doctor closes that door and opens another. "What disease is that?" Cassandra asks, disgusted. "All of them. Every single disease in the galaxy," the Doctor says. "They've been infected with everything." Cassandra asks if they're safe, and the Doctor says that the air is sterile: "Just don't touch them." He leans out over the railing, looking at the doors, all the doors. "How many patients are there?" Cassandra asks, and he corrects her: "They're not patients." But they're sick? The Doctor is pissed. "They were born sick. They're meant to be sick. They exist to be sick. Lab rats. No wonder the Sisters have got a cure for everything. They've built the ultimate research laboratory. A human farm." Something about how plague carriers are always the last to die, which is why they don't die, which whatever.

"It's for the greater cause," says Hame, ducking out to join them. The Doctor: "When you took your vows, did you agree to this?" She sidesteps: "The Sisterhood has sworn to help." Which makes the Doctor scream and yell, and Hame tries to explain: "But they're not real people, they're specially grown. They have no proper existence." The Doctor shouts at her about how many they must go through a day, and she's just not getting it: "Mankind needed us. They came to this planet with so many illnesses...We couldn't cope. We did try. We tried everything. We tried using clone-meat, and bio-cattle...but the results were too slow. So the Sisterhood grew its own flesh. That's all they are," she says, her voice getting harder. "Flesh." The Doctor protests that they're alive, and Hame is like, "But the humans out there that are healthy and happy, because of us!" The Doctor goes the full LeGuin: "If they live because of this, then life is worthless." But who's he to decide that? "I'm the Doctor. And if you don't like it -- if you want to take it to a higher authority -- there isn't one. It stops with me." Huh. Funny how that works out. Cassandra asks Hame to confirm for her that nobody in NNYC knows about that, and the Doctor finally asks: "I can understand the bodies, I can understand your vows, but one thing I can't understand: what have you done to Rose? And I'm being very, very calm. You wanna beware of that: very, very calm. And the only reason I'm being so very, very calm is that the brain is a delicate thing. Whatever you've done to Rose's head, I want it reversed." Hame swears that they didn't do anything to her, Cassandra protests that she's perfectly fine, but the Doctor knows better: "These people are dying, and Rose would care." Cassandra immediately admits that she's not Rose, and starts yanking the Doctor's necktie and calling him "clever clogs" and "smartypants" and "lady-killer." He is deeply concerned by all this, and asks what's wrong with her. "I knew something was going on in this hospital, but I needed this body and your mind to find it out," Cassandra explains, and he asks who she is. "The last human," she whispers, and he almost rolls his eyes, grossed out: "Cassandra?" She pulls her perfume out and sprays him, knocking him out; Hame kneels at the Doctor's side and, confused, says that she'll need to fetch Matron Casp. Cassandra: "You do that, 'cause I want to see her. Now, run along! Sound the alarm!" Novice Hame hurries off, and Cassandra rips a cable out of the wall, setting off alarms.

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