Doctor Who

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B- | 7 USERS: A
YOU GRADE IT
Joe Le Taxi

Tick tock, and the Doctor comes out of the smoking TARDIS, screaming for his little friend, sonicking the back door in a panic, screaming that Zero's in the house, trying desperately to sonic the hidden room before getting unceremoniously konked on the head with an oar, or a cricket bat, or something even more British.

Over in the Leadworth hospital, cutish but very British Nurse Rory is trying to explain to a doctor that all the coma patients have started calling for her -- meaning, of course, the Doctor. (Why?) She's not having it, but then one of them, a stocky bloke, followed by all of them (including awesome Olivia Colman from Peep Show), and then there's a bunch of staring at the coma patients.

Fade over on the last echoing moan to the Doctor, who's woozy in the Pond house. His eyes roll around and he is adorable. The camera goes up, up the sexy legs of a Scottish redhead dressed in a pervert's idea of a police costume, calling for backup on a white male, mid-20s, who has broken and entered. He whines about the cricket bat upside the head, and there's a cute moment where he admits that a cricket bat konk was exactly the thing to finish off his regeneration and get him back to rights. I like that. He stares at her and they talk about how she's police, and has backup coming. She's sharp and funny and a little bit mean -- until he asks about Amelia.

"Little Scottish girl, where is she? I promised her five minutes but the engines were phasing. I suppose I must have gone a bit far. Has something happened to her?" The woman stares at him, intrigued and already getting angry, and explains that Amelia Pond hasn't lived here in a long time: Six months. He's nearly got tears in his eyes, shouting about her: "No, no, no! I can't be six months late! I said five minutes. I promised! What happened to her?" The woman turns away so he can't see her face, and radios her sergeant again. "What happened to Amelia Pond?" What happened to Amelia Pond indeed.

The stocky unshaven bloke in the coma ward has pictures of his beloved black dog everywhere near his bedside, to keep him company. Rory can't seem to get a break from the doctor lady, whom even though she just heard them all yowling doesn't really think that Rory's obviously correct suspicions that something iffy is going on should be respected. Which I mean, this is a weird thing and I suppose she's within her fictional rights to blow it off altogether rather than running off into an adventure with this twitchy nurse -- he's got Frodo eyes -- so she tells him to go home and sleep off the crazy. "Why are you giving me your phone?" she interrupts herself, because he wants to give her proof that the talking coma people have also been wandering the village. Before he can show her the pics, her beeper goes off and she sends him home for the day. The shorthand for the bureaucratic frustration we're meant to be singing is him stuttering a lot of but-but-but, but it's effective enough.

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Doctor Who

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