Doctor Who
The End Of The World

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A | 3 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
This Is My Happening And It Freaks Me Out

Spiders scatter as the Doctor and Jabe enter the maintenance duct, acting like partygoers off on a little adventure. Which I guess is what they both are, in different yet awesome ways, but there's a very "the adults on The O.C. are getting wacky again" vibe. Champagne, daring is a turn-on, all that. Jabe tells the Doctor there's no captain on Platform One. It's just the Steward and the Oompas, and "all the rest is controlled by the metal man." Meaning Control, the computer. Jabe's whole "metal is nice, but I don't really get it" is a very cool character point. The Corporation controls the computer, moving the Platforms "from one artistic event to another." The Doctor notes that there's no one from the corporation on board, but Jabe doesn't get it, because she's a deb: "They're not needed. This facility is purely automatic. It's the height of the alpha class. Nothing can go wrong." The Doctor compares it to the Titanic, which he was there for: "Unsinkable?" Jabe allows that the "nautical metaphor is appropriate." The Doctor goes on about the Titanic, in case we didn't get it, and then clarifies, "So, what you're saying is, if we get in trouble, there's no one to help us out?" Not so much, no. The Doctor grins, of course, like a madman: "Fantastic!" He takes off walking, and Tree Lady is like, "Mwah?" Behind them, a spider creeps out of its hiding place.

Rose and Cassandra watch the sun and Earth in the gallery. Cassandra is really invested in her claim to fame: "Soon, the sun will blossom into a red giant, and my home will die. That's where I used to live, when I was a little boy. Down there. Mummy and Daddy had a little house built into the side of the Los Angeles Crevice." Nice little inclusive swipe there at her total mutability. She sighs: "I had such fun." Rose asks where the rest of humanity went, and Cassandra replies, "Mankind has touched every star in the sky." Rose asks if that doesn't mean that Cassandra's not, in fact, the actual Last, but she goes all Slytherin/Mudblood on Rose with a quickness: "I am the last pure human. The others...mingled." She makes as disgusted a face as a CGI tablecloth of skin can muster: "Oh, they call themselves 'New Humans' and 'Proto-humans' and 'Digi-humans' -- even 'Human-ish' -- but you know what I call them? Mongrels." Rose is grossed out, because back home, that's called National Front. There's a lovely double entendre here: "Right. And you stayed behind." Not getting Rose's meaning, Cassandra replies that she's kept herself "pure." Again showing her wit and skill with barbed meaning, Rose pretends to change the subject while actually calling Cassandra a total asshole: "Mm. How many operations have you had?" (The "Mm" in that line translates as a very British "Right. So tell me again how pure?") Cassandra has had 708 surgeries, and next week she's having her "blood bleached," so that's 709. Cassandra asks whether that's why Rose is chatting her up: "You could be flatter, Rose. You've got a little bit of a chin poking out." Rose, grimly and somewhat disgusted, says that she'd rather die, but Cassandra assures her that it doesn't hurt. This is a really good scene, and they're both so well written, that I will not bitch about Cassandra in this paragraph. Rose: "No, I mean it: I'd rather die. It's better to die than live like you -- a bitchy trampoline." Cassandra blows her off and Rose takes her on: "I was born on that planet. And so was my mum [dead], and so was my dad [not sure yet], and that makes me officially the Last Human Being in this room. Because you're not human. You've had it all nipped and tucked and flattened until there's nothing left. Anything human got chucked in the bin. You're just skin, Cassandra. Lipstick and skin. Nice talking with you." That's my girl. She takes off, and the Adherents of the Repeated Meme watch her leave the gallery altogether.

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Doctor Who

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