Doctor Who
The Hungry Earth

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B | 3 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Taffy Was A Thief

Of course, it's time for the Doctor to go below the surface to talk to the gnomes, which Nasreen finds weird, calling them "aliens," and he goes, "They're not aliens! They're Earth ... liens!" Silurians, Eocenes, homo reptilia: "Not monsters, not evil. Well, only as evil as you are. The previous owners of the planet, that's all. Look, from their point of view, you're the invaders. Your drill was threatening their settlement."

Ugh, I can't even go into the mindfuck of the word choices here. I'm not what you'd call a huge fan of Israel, but I do realize it's a multifaceted conflict with a history stretching back as far as persons do, and mainly what I do with that information is not write science fiction stories about a race of snake-people, with horns, who are raised communally and gender-blind, and who want to commit genocide on the people who now live in their ancestral home.

The Doctor gives the assemblage one of his We Could Be Heroes speeches, like Jeff with his pornographic laptop, and tells them while he's gone, under no circumstances should they torture the creature in the crypt, Alaya, to death. That's the only thing he tells them to do: "If she lives, so do Elliot and Mo and Amy. Because I will find them. While I'm gone, you four people, in this church, in this corner of planet Earth, you have to be the best of humanity." Needless to say, they are going to do terrible things to her. Mack's already onboard: "Shouldn't we be examining this creature, dissecting it, finding its weak points?" (Points off for misuse of "dissection," but you know I don't roll pedantic.) "You are decent, brilliant people. Nobody dies today. Understand?" They nod, but clearly it's not going to work out.

Wonderful Nasreen -- who like Catherine Tate before her comes from comedy, which gives her like Catherine Tate before her a tearjerking realness that lights up the screen whenever she's in frame -- decides she's coming with the Doctor, giving as her logic that since for some reason she's devoted her life to digging a bloody big hole, she will be seeing what's down there, thank you very much. Because she is worthwhile, the Doctor accepts, and basically leaves old Rory in charge. She loves the TARDIS in just the right way, not aghast or puking, but also not shrugging her off: Just loving her. "What does it do?" Everything! Before she can even touch anything, though, the gnomes get ahold of the TARDIS with their biosignals or whatever -- "They must've sensed the electromagnetic field!" and hijack her immediately. Going down?

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Doctor Who

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