Doctor Who
The Parting Of The Ways (2)

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 3 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
All The Umbrellas In London

Down on Floor Zero, everybody's wandering and being worried, except for Rodrick de Carabas from last week, who is, predictably, being a dick and wondering where his money is, even though everybody else is clearly edging on panic. Upstairs, male programmer tells the room -- "Oh my God!" he says -- that the Daleks are on the way, and on the ship, God's going nuts some more: "Purify the Earth with fire. The planet will become my temple and we shall rise. This will be our Paradise!" And the ships move towards the Satellite, far above the Earth. I don't even know what He's talking about. I prefer minimalism in decorating, too, but, as with anything, moderation is probably best.

Up on Floor 500, while everybody stares, the Doctor rips wires out of decks and wigs loudly: "Dalek plan -- big mistake. Because what have they left me with? Anyone? Anyone? Oh, come on, it's obvious. A great big transmitter! This station! If I can change the signal, fold it back, sequence it...anyone?" Captain Jack works it out: a "Delta wave" of "Van Cassadyne energy" that will fry your brain if you get in the way. I don't know. Delta waves are for sleeping, which is the opposite of what they're trying to do, but delta is change in the calculus, so maybe we just ignore it. (Oh, here we are, the Fifth Doctor built a "delta wave augmenter" to ... help somebody sleep. Fuck it. Wave of Change.) Jack and the Doctor hop around like boyfriends about the Delta wave and Rose is about to join in when Lynda gets her "Y" all up in the mix instead, shutting Rose's mouth like a trap: "Well, get started and do it then!" Which is probably more to the point than anything Rose might've come out with, these days, anyway. Even with a brain "as clever as" his own, the Doctor' says that they're still looking at three days to build the wave...and the Dalek are arriving in twenty-two minutes. But the Doctor just continues to frantically pull cables out...but he does smile in that way he has, so I guess it'll be all right.

Jack explains that they can't get blown up because of the forcefield, but realizes that the Daleks will still come rolling in physically onto the Gamestation -- and that they will have cottoned to the Delta wave concept, as well. He points to a schematic of the Gamestation and shows the rest of them how he's going to concentrate the magic surfboard vibrations around the top five levels, so the Daleks will have to come in at 494 and fight their way up. Fight who? Excellent question. Fight Captain Jack. And anybody on Gamestation who's up for a tussle. Which amounts to...Captain Jack. See what reality TV does to people? Even with Jack's nonsense about "bastic bullets" (which we've seen in older stories), lady programmer is like, "Um, can you count? There are five people here." The Doctor calls to Rose to help him with the futile wire-stripping and Delta prep, and the lady programmer is like, "And now there are four of us." Jack orders them to move out -- all four of them -- like when he was being all Riley Finn in "Boom Town." As usual, it is very thrilling, as Jack makes orders: "Move it! Into the [elevator!] lift! Isolate the [elevator!] lift controls!" Everybody runs off, and Lynda comes up to say "thanks, I suppose" to the Doctor. She promises to do her best. So does he. Rose's hilarious face is behind them, all "What's the word for exterminate times a thousand?" as she tries to create a Lynda-centered Delta wave with the power of her mind. But to be fair, the Doctor and Lynda come a whisper close to fully kissing, in an awkward "Do I hug my brother-in-law right now or is that gay" kind of way. The wire in her hands gets stripped like no wire has ever been stripped before. It's like, "Lady, leave me something."

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