MONDO EXTRAS

Fiona screams at the kid pawns, now, to tell Dave that he's "just being silly." As Dave says goodbye to the kids, she climbs all over him like a snotty wet jungle gym. "You haven't been listening! I'm not having a go, I'm not. I love you! Love's the most important thing! Jesus said so! I love you!" He watches her climb around on the car, looking vile. "And you love me! You might not know it, but you do! We can go find Steven, he'll tell you! He knows everything." He begins to pull away.

"I forgive you, Dave!" Fiona wails. "I forgive you! That makes it all right! I forgive you!" Dave pulls into the road. Fiona: "You've got to love me! You've got to love me, because if you don't love me, it...doesn’t say! It doesn't say what happens! It doesn't say what happens if I'm not loved!" Tail lights. And I'll tell you, that's when it kicked in. That shit is a cold shower on your superiority. Because it doesn't say, and the world conspired to tell her that it mattered. That it was all that mattered. Dave's having an affair? Well, at least he stays in the marriage. At least I'm loved. The only thing that matters: somebody proving that you're worthy of love. If you buy TV you can't be blamed for thinking that's true. That it proves you exist. Especially if you're weak and a little stupid, like old Fiona. It hurts. She finally said enough out loud that it's too much. God promised her an answer and then handed her Judgment. Bait and switch. Dave promised her Eastenders and handed her Coronation Street. She's the point: somebody who let everybody else do all the heavy lifting because nobody ever told her she was allowed to do it herself.