Doctor Who

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A | 2 USERS: A+
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People Are Places

Who knows, but that's what I'm feeling right now. What else... Always pay attention to what they're wearing. I cannot stress this enough. If you're watching a TV show that you've never seen before, and have used up your questions about WTF is going on, you can still learn about 80% of what you need to know just from what the people are wearing. It's a conceit left over from the theatre days, but it's also a huge part of what is working on you when you're watching television. Anybody wearing the same color is on the same team, anybody wearing contrasting colors is not. Light is good or authoritative, dark is questionable. I cannot, again, stress this enough: Always pay attention to what they're wearing. Start practicing this week. You're going to need it.

So if it was a phase-shift, it was sabotage. A complex plan, carried out over who knows how long, by the very patient. The building it crashed into was a temple, unoccupied for centuries, of the two-headed Aplan indigenous to this planet, Alfava Metraxis. Due to spoilers, Dr. Song learns she'll be a Professor by the time we meet her, but not that she'll die on that day. She gets her first real grin out of him, with her knowing thrill about learning even a little. He relaxes, a bit. Amy's still confused about the timey-wimeyness of the trick she pulled, and Song grins: "Two things always guaranteed to show up in a museum. The Homebox of a Category IV Starliner, and sooner or later: Him. It's how he keeps score."

They grin and get to giggling about his ways, so he gets testy again. (This is totally how women and men behave, with their storied intuition and their clucking; their blustery inability to ask directions, their fear of purchasing tampons at the store. It's uncanny!) "I'm nobody's taxi service! I'm not gonna be there to catch you every time you feel like jumping out of a spaceship." River figures out there's one thing left, a survivor in the belly of the ship. He gets scared, and Amy watches him. They are condescending about him some more, and River gets on the phone to some heretofore unknown folks.

"You lot in orbit yet? Yeah, I saw it land. I'm at the crash site. Try and hone in on my signal..." She calls to the Doctor for a sonic assist, the better to call them down. "Ooh, Doctor! You sonicked her!" giggles Amy, still entranced by this idea of man and God somehow touching; explicitly sexualizing what has always been implicit. Waiting for her fellows, River takes out her diary -- which is both TARDIS and a Journal of Impossible Things -- and asks if they've done the Bone Meadows yet. The Doctor tells Amy to stay the fuck away from the book, "her" diary, and River grins: "Our diary." I think this is when Amy figures out who they are, what they are to each other. "Her past, my future... Time travel."

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Doctor Who

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