Episode Nine

Episode Report Card
Kim: C+ | Grade It Now!
Signed, Sealed, Delivered.

J Rome and John are the final two. Quddus asks Robin if America got the final two right. Robin says that they were definitely the most consistent. That's different from saying that they're the best, although I guess he can't say that and stay loyal to his own partners. John doesn't want to pick a winner, although he did say last week that he would sign J Rome if possible, so he's sticking with that. Jennifer is all verklempt because those are her two partners. Quddus reminds us that Kelly has been in the position of the finalists, and she laughs and says that while she and Justin both said they wanted the other to win, that wasn't exactly true. But she knows that all of the contestants just want to make an album and get their careers started.

Quddus kills some more time with dumb questions and everyone is just like, "GET ON WITH IT!" And the winner is... J Rome. Well, honestly. I would be so sad if it were John. Well, not sad, because I'm not that emotionally invested. Disappointed, slightly. John gets shunted aside and Jennifer runs up on stage and hugs J Rome. Hey, her pants are normal in the back. The audience starts chanting J Rome's name. J Rome is going to sing "Signed, Sealed, Delivered" and everyone comes up on stage to hug him so how is he going to sing? This is a mess. Hey, Jordan dyed her hair back to blonde. She looks great! I wish she got to sing again. All of the pros are singing backup for him. Aw. I can't get over how pretty Jordan looks with the blonde hair. Anyway, that's it! And this show got terrible ratings so it probably won't get another season! I hope we all learned a lesson and that lesson is that Jennifer Nettles has terrible fashion sense and Robin Thicke should never be allowed on television again. Done and done.

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