Eastwick
Eastwick

Episode Report Card
Montykins: C+ | 1634 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Like Charmed, But Older

In a fancy restaurant, Kat insists to Roxie that nothing weird is going on. Then Joanna enters in a skin-tight slinky dress, saying she feels different and powerful. Kat recaps the incident with Bun, and Darryl interrupts them, boasting of the restaurant he owns and offering to buy them dinner if he can eat with them. He's immediately distracted by Kat, because he hasn't actually met her yet. He praises her hands, which we are led to believe have healing properties. They're "nurturing and destructive". I see.

Darryl praises the three of them and has his possibly-mute butler enter with some water from the Lennox mansion's well. It has some dubious properties for well water. It can cure arthritis and also get people drunk. Kat insists that she doesn't believe in magic and hates all the rumors and myths in this town. Darryl leans into Roxie's personal space and offers sixty thousand for her to get her hands on his enormous lump of clay. Oh, and he wants to pose nude. She considers him a pig.

The women pile out of the restaurant, giggling and laughing. They rush over to the fountain, and start dancing in the water. That's all there is to do in this town. It's either the book club or reenact the Friends opening credits. But just then! Kat's asshole husband Raymond demands to know what she's doing. I can't tell if he's angry about having been left alone with the kids or he just hates people messing with the town fountain. He drags her away, angry that she's drunk in public (although she points out that he's drunk all the time). He tells her not to talk to "these people" ever again and points her to her children, who are posed in an artful tableau by the side of the road, waiting for her.

Mia and hey boyfriend (Gus) are by a lake. He pressures her for sex, and she tries to push him away. It starts raining as he pushes her against a wooden, um, thing. Rape is imminent, and then Roxie wakes up in Darryl's limo. She follows her instincts and insists that Darryl take her to the lake. The possibly-mute butler's name turns out to be "Fidel", and he takes them there.

They find Gus molesting Mia under a wooden bridge, and Darryl flings Gus away. "Touch her again, I'll kill ya." Roxie comforts Mia.

Kat's place. Raymond is furious, shouting at her with totally undeserved righteousness. She insists on being treated with respect, and he threatens to smack her. As he stomps out into the rain, she shouts at him and complains that all he does is drink beer. "You've got no fire! No spark! No electricity!" So naturally, a bolt of lightning hits him square in the chest.

Eastwick

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