At the bowling alley, Ed and Jim are having a lighthearted yet stimulating conversation about bowling when Phil makes the heartbreaking announcement that Wally Loser has been missing for thirty-six hours. Ed springs into action and says he's going to go talk to Dr. Crazy. Christ. This is starting to sound like a recap of Smallville or something.
Ed gets to the TV studio, where Bob is trying to get Dr. Crazy to eat some test tubes. Crazy doesn't want to eat any test tubes; he's been down that road before, and if you've ever experienced shitting ground-up glass, you'd probably pass on the whole affair, too. Ed tells Crazy that Wally Loser is missing. Crazy has no idea who that is, and Ed tells him he's the kid who asked for his autograph at the First Annual Stuckey Bowl Halloween Bowling Bash...now on video and DVD with extra added bonus features. Crazy recalls the kid and says that the kid's disappearance has nothing to do with him. For the record, Gary Condit pops into the scene and announces his innocence as well. Ed needs to know what Crazy told the kid, and Crazy says he was in a bad mood, and told the kid that life would never get better for him and that if the kid had a hair on his balls, he'd take off on the next bus to Happyville and become a crack dealer. Bob asks Crazy whether he'd rather eat a beaker, and then takes a bite out of it to show Crazy its texture. Crazy's obviously a disgruntled test-tube-eating children's television host as he walks away.
Over at the Smiling Goat, Molly, Carol, Nancy, and Mike are sitting at a table when Molly and Carol decide to leave and go back to Carol's place for some hot lesbian action. Mike tells them that it's rude to leave when someone's beer isn't finished. Being rude is a fate worse than death in Stuckeyville, so the two decide to sit and watch as Mike sips his beer, obviously either stalling for time or nursing an alcohol-soaked liver problem. Here's a shocker: Traveling Bowling Paraphernalia Salesman Jim shows up. Molly freaks and asks Mike whether Ed told him Jim was coming there. Mike says he's just a man enjoying a beer. Jim walks over to the booth and Carol asks Jim to join them, telling Molly to "scoot over." Molly scoots over and Jim takes a seat. I'm hypnotized by Molly's cleavage and fade in and out of consciousness for the rest of the week.