Ed
Ed

Episode Report Card
Uncle Bob: D | 426 USERS: C+
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Pilot

Ed is seen moving in with his old best friend, Mike, who looks amazingly like Ben Affleck after a seven-month bender. Mike is married to Nancy, and together they have a four-month-old baby named Sara, who is quite possibly the worst actor on television since Rob Lowe. While Ed and Mike are carrying Ed's belongings into the home, Nancy is showing Sara's new nanny what she does to the baby when she gets colicky. I think that's the word. You know...has colic. Coughs a lot. Cries. You know. Nancy takes the baby and begins shaking it and making these odd sounds like the mating call of a cockatoo. The nanny looks on in horror. The baby is fascinated by the camera, breaking down the fourth wall in television. We (the viewing public) wonder what the hell we've gotten into when baby-shaking is passed off as "humor." Ed's asking Mike whether he should call Carol. After all, it's been two weeks since he kissed her and then impulsively bought the town's bowling alley: isn't that a long enough waiting period to resume stalking? Mike's not exactly sure, because, so far, Mike hasn't ever gone off the deep end after catching his wife doing the horizontal bop with the mailman.

We go back to Nancy, who is showing off her latest innovation in technology --"Mommy Vision" -- to the nanny. The video is basically Nancy acting like an idiot for a video camera, and is supposed to soothe the baby while Mommy's away. In my humble opinion, it'd scare the kid worse than a clown on fire bursting into her room.

Ed goes to Stuckey Bowl, the bowling alley he bought two weeks BEFORE the current scene. He walks in, turns on all the lights, and wakes a man sleeping on a bench. The man introduces himself as Phil, one of the employees of the bowling alley. Ed introduces himself as the new owner of the bowling alley. Phil excuses himself, grabs a cup of water, and asks Ed to repeat himself. Ed does, and Phil does a spit take with the water and then proclaims that Danny Thomas was a comedic genius.

All right...two quick comments. If Ed bought the bowling alley two weeks before this scene, shouldn't his new employees have already (a) met him or (b) at least heard the bowling alley had been sold? Second comment: Danny Thomas was about as much a comedic genius as Ted Koppel.

Ed

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