Ed
Pilot

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Revamped? More like ReCrapped

In the re-enactment, we see John White looking at the word "Croatoan" carved into a tree (in real life, it was carved into a fence post -- details, people!) and then some weird-looking glyphs carved into the tree as well. Chloe explains that Adam believed John White's journal was incomplete, and that White really found something so horrifying that it was expunged from public record. Re-enactment John White reaches into a crevice in the base of the carved-up tree and pulls out a strip of burlap. He unwraps it to reveal a chain with a round charm on it, which is covered in glyphs similar to those on the tree. As he looks at it, we hear what the captioning calls "ghostly laughter." John White turns to see a little girl in a hooded robe standing behind him, but when he grabs his torch to get a better view, the little girl is gone. He sees her walking further away, and calls out, "Virginia?" and drops the necklace to walk closer. The little girl starts running, and John White gives chase. Wouldn't John White have an English accent? He has kind of a New England-y Grams-from-Dawson's-Creek thing going on. Anyway, Virginia stops in a clearing and turns to look at him, and her face is covered in green makeup. Why? Who knows. We see something rushing at John White as he screams in terror, and then we go to commercial.

Derek looks at some pictures of "Virginia Dare" as Chloe tells him that some local tribes had legends about her being a "shape-shifter," and that Adam became obsessed with one particular passage he believed came from John White's diary. It read, "But dreadfully, in the stead of my granddaughter, there awaited for me something born not of man, something fearsum." Hey, remember when this show was supposed to be titled "Fearsum"? Yeah, me too. Derek pages through some of Adam's notes, which contain lots of drawings of glyphs similar to those carved into the tree in the re-enactment. Derek asks if the name "V. Elsing" means anything to Chloe, and she says no. Derek plans to find out who is "playing games with [his] mind" by starting "at the beginning." He's going to go back to Colonial times? What is this, Quantum Leap? I wish it was Quantum Leap.

Derek and Chloe enter Adam's house, which I guess we are supposed to believe has stood vacant for the past three years, and yet has no damage of any kind, and wasn't vandalized by local youths. Derek hands Chloe a camera and tells her to "keep the tape running." Via Chloe-cam, we see Derek going through pictures and bookshelves. She asks why he never cleared out Adam's things. Why didn't she? Derek says he didn't want to accept "the truth about what happened." Wait, aren't they supposed to be in Florida? Who wears leather jackets in Florida in October? Chloe goes into the bedroom and has a voice-over flashback of her and Adam together. Derek asks if she's okay, and she snaps out of it and volunteers to check the bathroom. Derek says he will, and gently takes the camera from her. Derek goes in and pulls back the closed shower curtain to reveal -- Adam's decomposing body! Ha! Just kidding. That would have been kind of cool, though. There's nothing there, but he films the walls and ceiling anyway.

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Ed

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