Ed
Ed

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515 USERS: C+
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A Waffle Upside The Head Means I Love You

In the doctor's office, Mike is treating a patient while Dr. Jerome looks on. Mike diagnoses the woman as having an ear infection and prescribes her a drug that I can't pronounce, let alone type. Jerome groans as he listens to Mike. Mike asks for his input on the matter and Jerome just sits back and says "I'm just observing. Pretend I'm not here." Which is not an easy feat considering he's wheezing and groaning more than my grandma suffering an asthma attack.

Carol's at her school desk when flowers arrive with the note, "I've been there...your pal, Ed." Nick walks in just as they're delivered and asks who sent them. Carol hesitates and then says Ed. Nick wants to know if "that little pissant" is the one behind their breakup. Carol insists that he's not the reason and asks to talk about it tomorrow. This makes me want to take the time here to explain to you young kids reading this recap...if you lie, you go straight to hell. Carol's a liar. Carol's going to hell. Don't go to hell with her. Don't lie.

It's beginning to look like after seven bumpy years together...it's over. This finally clears the path for Ed to be promoted from a "obsessed stalker" to a "potential boyfriend" of Carol's. There's no indication of what Nick will do after this breakup, but a safe bet would be that he's going to try to jump off a kitten with his truck battery -- you know, being evil and all.

Ed's in his office when Carol shows up. Carol thanks him for the flowers and asks Ed how he knew for sure that his relationship with his wife was truly over. Ed doesn't hesitate as he recounts the time he caught his wife in bed naked with a mailman...that pretty much gave him the heads-up on the relationship's going sour. Carol asks whether he has any advice for her, and he says he hasn't got any. Sela shows up with some paperwork, which is Carol's cue to slither out of the office. Carol looks at Sela and gives Ed a thumbs-up on his "new woman." While Ed and Sela are talking, a topless Phil begins washing the office windows, seductively rubbing his chest up against the window for Sela's amusement. Sela's still not impressed, but I'm sitting in my recliner, gulping Robitussin down, just so I can laugh and watch it come back out my nose. To say the absolute least, I'm easily amused when it comes to watching Phil and guzzling cough syrup.

Ed

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