Meanwhile, in the courtroom, Dick's attorney says that since Sela kept the money that wasn't hers, she should have to pay it back. Ed, as always, goes on a lengthy spiel about how pretty girls make men do strange things. When we find out we can't have them, we go a little bit crazy. We do things like write gooey love letters, poke holes in condoms, and vote Libertarian. It's not Sela's fault she's a pretty girl. Oh...and Dick Knight is one devious sonofabitch for setting Sela up like this. I rest my case.
Mike finishes his complete physical of Dr. Jerome and rattles off more medical terminology than I could possibly comprehend. He finally diagnoses Dr. Jerome with acute mono. In my heart, I think Jerome was hoping for asexy mono, but one takes what they can get.
The judge shocks the entire town of Stuckeyville and rules AGAINST Ed, determining that Sela has to pay back all $4,900.
Twenty-two million people just gasped in horror at the verdict. This is more shocking than O.J.'s acquittal.
BUT...there's a catch: Sela will have to pay Dick Knight five dollars a week for eighteen years with no interest. So really...ED WINS!!
Twenty-two million people just exhaled.
Sela hugs Ed and asks him out for a celebratory cocktail. Ed takes a raincheck, saying he has to go see a "friend."
We then get our weekly montage of tying up loose story ends while a tender piece of music plays in the background. We see Nick packing his stuff up in boxes and leaving Carol's house while Carol stands and cries. We see Molly helping her ugly duckling become a beautiful swan with the help of barrettes and a flame thrower. We then see Carol laying in her bed crying when a weird noise appears in the background. Carol gets up and rushes to her window in hopes of seeing a jolly fat man with eight tiny reindeer. Alas...it's just Ed, flinging frozen waffles at her window. Hundreds of waffles. They're everywhere -- the roof, the yard, in trees. Technically, she probably could have had Ed arrested for doing such a thing, but instead she opens up her window and tells Ed she "can't take [him] being adorable right now." Ed shrugs and says he can't just turn it off. I know how that is...I live with being adorable twenty-four hours a day. Ed asks to come in. Carol says it's not a good time, with which I agree wholeheartedly. I mean...it's obvious the whole waffle thing was based upon hormones from hell acting up and by now...her monthly friend "Flo" was probably hanging out in her ovaries...so...ummm...come back in four days, Ed. Ed says he doesn't wanna come up and sex her madly; he has something that can help her out. He holds up a brown paper bag. Carol naturally thinks it's a case of Robitussin and lets him in as hormonal babes are wont to do.