Ed walks into the local Hi-Fi Hut and approaches Irv, played by The Late Show's Paul Schaffer with a bushy mustache and glasses my grandfather wouldn't be caught dead wearing because they're too square. Ed introduces himself and says he used to play basketball for Stuckeyville High when Irv refereed the games there. Ed asks Irv if he still refs and Irv says no. A while back, a fourteen-year-old kid didn't like one of his calls and found him after the game and beat him with a sack of gym shoes. Coulda been a bag full of jocks, Irv...count yer blessings, babe. Ed tells Irv he's getting a do-over for that horrifying game fifteen years ago and wants Irv to come referee it. Irv asks Ed if he likes action movies. Ed says he does. Irv shows him a back massager and says if Ed were to hook it up to his DVD player with surround sound, it'd feel like he was the one getting his ass kicked. Ed says he doesn't want the back massager. Irv says he doesn't wanna ref Ed's game. Ed smells what the Irv is cooking and agrees to buy the back massager. Irv agrees to ref the game. The Palestinians shake hands with the Israelis and the world is a much happier place.
Back at the alley, Phil has fitted Shirley with an earpiece so that he can feed her lines to use on Frankenhomie. As long as she repeats everything that Phil feeds her, she'll end up with a spanking new boyfriend, courtesy of Cyrano de Stubbsiac. Shirley worries that it may not work and what if she intercepts some television signal instead and picks up an Olive Garden commercial and starts babbling about shrimp scampi. Phil convinces her that everything will go perfectly since he bought this equipment on eBay. Shirley walks over to Frankenhomie, who's wearing his Santa Claus cap and looking like the illegitimate love child of Rain Man and Whoopi Goldberg. Phil leans into his microphone and yells, "Yo, yo, yo...wassap...WASSAAAAAP??" Shirley removes her earpiece, turns, glares at Phil and walks away, leaving Frankenhomie sad and alone.