A side note: Mike studies way too much in bed. He's done it twice in two episodes. Give it a rest, Dr. Dumbass.
Meanwhile, while Ed's rambling on about Carol, Carol is shown at a romantic picnic with Nick Stanton, evil teacher, boyfriend of Carol, and Ed's chief nemesis. Nick proclaims his love for Carol, and Carol returns the favor by looking like she just swallowed a charm bracelet.
We go back to Mike and Ed as Ed is trying to convince himself and Mike, as well as Mike's wife Nancy who is flossing her teeth and preparing for bed, that Carol is head-over-heels in love with him. This is going on at the exact same time that Carol and Nick are enjoying a little tête-à-tête under the stars. Oh...the irony!
Nancy gets into bed with the two men and the lights go out. I instinctively reach for my crotch and commence massaging. Then Ed says, "I guess I should go to my room now, right?" Which pretty much ruins the moment for the Pittster. I go flaccid within seconds.
We go to commercials.
We're in Ed's office inside the bowling alley, and Ed is complaining to someone on the phone that he never wanted palm trees in his office or painted on the windows of his office. ["If he wanted palm trees, he'd have asked for palm trees!" -- niki] Ed seems to have a real problem with palm trees. He's really bitching about the palm trees and this is the first time we're shown the uglier side of Ed. I'm not sure I like it. I sure hope America doesn't turn on Ed over this...this...this palm-tree-hating outburst. Ed picks up a spatula and stares at it like it's the latest issue of "Penthouse." America is having second thoughts on this whole love affair with Ed deal as we start to realize...we've fallen in love with a perv. A guy walks into the office and tells Ed he'll paint the words "Stuckey Bowl" above the bowling lanes for $1,500. Ed says, "How about $300?" The guy thinks about it and says, "How about $1,500?" I giggle to myself because I've been there. You know...trying to get people to take less money for services rendered. Of course, mine was with a one-eyed Danish prostitute, but I could still relate to Ed's plight. Ed blows the guy off and walks away. Phil comes running up behind Ed and starts babbling about a catalog full of items they need for the bowling alley, like salt and pepper shakers, napkin holders...the works. Ed, getting more and more frustrated with Phil's incessant chatter, gives Phil free reign to order whatever he wants from the catalog for the bowling alley. Oh boy. I've seen my share of sitcoms, so I KNOW that this is going to lead to some crazy-assed hijinks. Never let the show's hipster doofus have control over something as crazy as ordering salt shakers.