Ed
Ed

Episode Report Card
Uncle Bob: C- | 544 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Rumors Of Ed's Demise Are Hardly Exaggerated

In the courtroom, Judge Donnelly calls Carol to the bench to plead her case. She was apparently going 53 in a 40 mph zone. Carol pleads not guilty. To the speeding...not to her lack of common sense. She then starts babbling that she wasn't going that fast and that she's never gotten a ticket before and she's talking way too fast for my chubby little hand to write it all down. But trust me...if it was coming out of Carol's mouth, it wasn't important. The judge asks her to choose, heads or tails. She looks flabbergasted as he explains that he's about to flip a coin to determine her fate. Carol stammers and doesn't pick a side, so he tells her he'll make it easy for her: heads she's guilty, tails she's not. He flips the coin and it's heads...guilty. It's now time to spin the wheel of justice. The wheel is unveiled, and the bailiff is ordered to spin it. The wheel is spun as Carol sweats out the punishment. Ahhh...stand on one leg and sing "Bad Bad Leroy Brown." Carol says she can't sing. The judge orders Carol to sing or spend the night in jail. She sings...if you can call it singing. She sounds more like a border collie getting its throat slit, but it amuses the Judge and gets her out of spending the evening with a large, handsome woman named Tommy, so it's probably worth it in the long run.

Back at the alley, Phil and Kenny are inspecting the gaggle of clowns that have answered the newspaper ad. Phil tells them to take a look to the left and then a look to the right. He informs them that the people on either side of each of them won't be there long. He then instructs them to begin a series of clowning exercises, and watches them "clown." He tells them that, over the next several days, they will be weeded out until only one of them remains; that clown will have the heart, mind, and will to become the official clown of Stuckey Bowl on weekends. A Korean clown asks if this will really take days. Phil snaps and says that, yes, it will take days, and if anyone has a problem with that, they can start walking right now. Nearly all of the clowns walk away. Phil laments about the days when wearing the big clown shoes meant something to clowns. Today it just means you're one clumsy asshole.

Ed

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