Back in the Stuckey Bowl, Phil is monitoring the clowns as they make balloon animals. He instructs them to make giraffes and reiterates that a giraffe is NOT a poodle with a long neck. As the clowns frantically tie their respective balloons into mishapen knots, Phil sees one of the clowns struggling to make a balloon giraffe that looks more like a balloon snake with a spinal fracture. Phil takes the clown aside and asks him his name. The clown says his name is Jacob. Phil asks Jacob if he worked on his balloon animals the night before and Jacob swears he did. Phil says that he heard Jacob was out until 3 AM drinking vodka gimlets and hitting on sorority Susies. Phil tells Jacob that he has a God-given talent to make balloon animals, and instructs him to get back in the group with the rest of the clowns and twist the shiznit up. Phil saunters back over to Kenny and tells him to cut 1, 4, and 10. Kenny asks if he's going to leave Jacob in there, and Phil says yes, because he sees Jacob going all the way. Kenny says, "But he's terrible." Without a moment's hesitation, Phil agrees and tells Kenny to get rid of him as well. That's the only thing I don't like about Phil: he tends to abuse any semblance of power handed to him.
In Ed's sporty SUV, Carol is reading out directions to the cabin that Miss Migaski scrawled out for them. Carol tells Ed to take a left at the dog. Ed says there can't be a dog on the map. Carol shows him the map and, sure enough, the secretary drew a dog on the map. I'm thinking maybe the judge ran away because his secretary's crazier than a hoot owl. Ed thinks they should have turned right several miles back, and Carol tells him to turn around, then. When Ed goes to turn around, he gets stuck in the mud. Not a little stuck...a lot stuck. As in marrying a woman whose dad is a Soprano. You're stuck, buddy.
Back in Mike's office, Jack Foster is applying makeup to Mike's face and telling him to introduce himself. Mike looks into the camera and says, "Hello there," like Freddy "Boom Boom" Washington from Welcome Back, Kotter. Mike gets frustrated and says that he's not an actor. I agree wholeheartedly until I realize that it's his character saying it. Jack tells Mike to introduce himself to the camera as "Dr. Handsome." Mike gets even more pissed and says he's NOT calling himself "Dr. Handsome." Jack sighs, hands Mike a hat, and tells him to put it on, pretending that he's just arrived at work. Mike refuses to wear the hat, even when Jack swears that it's the same type of hat that Vincent Price wore on the cover of Cigar Aficionado one time. So Jack gets some dumbbells and tells Mike to do some curls with the dumbbells. Mike doesn't want to do this, either, and everyone quickly realizes that they are working with the biggest diva since Barbra Streisand. Jack explains that people will be coming to Mike to have them take care of them, and that they would feel better about him if they saw him taking care of himself by lifting weights. Mike thinks about it, and Jack tells him not to be a freak about it. Carmella pipes up and tells him to take the freakin' dumbbells. Finally, Carmella steps up to the plate of common sense and bats a homer.