Ed
Your Life Is Now

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Your Life Is Now

We're then bombarded with more commercials.

Carol and Ed walk down the street. Ed asks about Carol's date with Troy, which Carol emphatically denies is a "date" -- it's just two friends going out on the town after several years of separation. Ed reminds Carol that, in high school, she and Troy were like Sinatra and Ava Gardner while Ed was more like Wojo from Barney Miller. He then does an uncanny impression of Carol that sounds nothing like her, but does nail her pretty-girl persona down pat.

Back in court, Ed's on the witness stand and acting rather childish, since this is his first time on the stand. He's being accused of spreading the flyers all over the town, when he corrects the plaintiff's attorney by saying he wrote the flyers, he printed the flyers, he hung up the flyers, and he's damned proud of the whole enterprise. It was a childish scheme intended to cause the store monetary damage. It was a $300 refrigerator, and he wanted to even the score.

On school grounds, Warren's hanging out by a tree when Jessica and her friends walk up. Jessica says hi to Warren and informs him that she was just telling her friends how brave and amazing Warren is. Warren is macking like James Dean; he's ultra-suave and cool. Jessica asks whether he plans to go to the big party at the bowling alley, and Warren says that he might swing by. Jessica is all gooey-eyed and says, "Maybe I'll see you there." Warren is ecstatic as Jessica and her friends walk on.

Back in court, the store's attorney presents his case to the jury. Tucker's Appliances didn't make a delivery. Did Ed sue them? No. Did he ask for his money back? No. What he did was bring the business to a grinding halt for one day and he should be held responsible for his actions.

Ed presents his case. He had just moved into his new place. This was the first appliance he had bought for his new place. He was then treated like garbage after giving the store his money. Ed reiterates that the store took his time, not his money. Time is worth a whole lot more to Ed than the money is. Since he only took $4,600 of their money, Ed feels that Tucker's got off cheap. The judge points out that Ed also robbed each of those customers of their valuable time by making them stand in the store all day. So Ed's punishment is that he has to write a hundred-word apology to each one of those customers for stealing their day away from them. As the judge says, "It's the best I can come up with." Apparently the death penalty never even entered the judge's mind.

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Ed

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