The episode starts with two underwear-clad ladies dancing for Holmes's pleasure. Well, it really starts with almost an hour of the Super Bowl, but we'll ignore that for now. Even the dancing ladies are mostly irrelevant, because they're a pair of thieves that make a habit of handcuffing men to chairs and then robbing them blind. Holmes was anticipating this, so he lets the police in to arrest them.
In the actual story, there's Howard Ennis, a serial killer who's been brought to a hospital so he can donate a kidney to his sister. But he uses mystic arts of the East to pretend to be anesthetized, and then he kills the surgeon and escapes. Those serial killers can be tricky. That's why the FBI sends in Kathryn Drummond, a profiler who's worked this case before. Holmes gets all touchy and angry, because he thinks profiling is ridiculous nonsense, unlike his "deducting," which is of course entirely scientific.
Holmes and Drummond agree that Ennis is probably going to lay low and change his appearance. But what he actually does is run right out and kill everyone in a store, then have someone take his picture. There's also a ridiculously convoluted clue from the hospital, but it's such an obvious red herring that nobody takes it seriously. The real question is why Holmes is so angry at Drummond. It turns out that when they worked together, he slept with her. And then she wrote a mean article about him called "The Deductionist," in which she predicted his self-annihilation from drugs.
It turns out that Ennis is angry at Drummond for claiming that his parents abused him, which resulted in his father's suicide. And his sister didn't really have a bad kidney. So she was in on it, which Drummond only finds out by getting stabbed in the neck. That's what she gets for not answering her phone.
Holmes tracks Ennis to his secret lair, which is an abandoned building that's simply overflowing with chandeliers. Then he provides a brilliant game of wits involving handcuffs and a pistol, but it just ends with him beating Ennis to a pulp with a heavy stick.
And in the other story, Watson apparently has her own rent-controlled apartment somewhere. And she's in danger of being evicted because she sublet it to a guy who shot a porn movie in there. The stakes are pretty low, since we've never seen the place before.
Elementary started late tonight because the Super Bowl Blackout. Remember that weird ad about how God created farmers? That's what was on when the show was supposed to start. We actually kick things off an hour and ten minutes after it was scheduled to start. Which is only 8:10 here on the West Coast, so I don't really mind that much.
Okay! You know that song about how the singer is the cat with the bass and drum? She kind of screeches like a monkey at one point? That's what's playing when the show starts. Two attractive ladies are dancing around in their underwear while Holmes sits on a chair shirtlessly. They handcuff him to the chair and then suddenly shut off the music. They announce that they're robbing him. One of them has rubber gloves with blades on them as she demands to know where he keeps his money. Holmes reflects on their habit of attacking "innocent whoremongers" and then calls the cops in. It was a trap!
The next morning, Holmes practices with a "Single Stick," hitting a dummy in a target in its forehead. Watson comes in and says she has to go deal with her apartment because the subletters have been causing problems. Holmes thinks she's crazy to maintain a New York apartment, but it's rent-controlled. Holmes beats the dummy up.
A prison van drops off a balding, squinting guy named Mr. Ennis. It's Terry Kinney! I'm excited by this because I was a big fan of Oz and I always thought McManus should spend some time as a prisoner. And now he is! He's here to have his kidney removed and put in his sister, although he's not allowed to see her. He's also allegedly a scary person, which is conveyed by guards being very careful around him.
Ennis is all handcuffed up, even as they prepare to operate. He's injected with anesthetic and he counts down from twenty, as is traditional. He seems to eye some scalpels, but his heart rate goes down as he falls asleep. The doctor has the handcuffs removed because surely it's safe now. And then the anesthetist notices that the anesthetic isn't really entering the vein. It's just pooling up in his arm. Ennis takes a scalpel and starts slicing people up until he can get a gun. Then he shoots them!
Holmes and Watson arrive in a cab. Gregson tells them the story so far. Well, the Ennis part. He doesn't cover the football game or the stripper-thieves. Holmes says all of Ennis's victims were blonde and over 5'7". Watson supplies that he was called "The Peeler." Holmes objects to giving him a cool nickname because he believes that serial killers aren't nearly interesting enough to deserve cool nicknames.