Eli Stone
Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B | Grade It Now!
I Hate Sassy Patti

Eli is trying to return the engagement ring he got for Taylor, but the woman won't take it back without a receipt, which Eli can't find. Okay, seriously, show, stop it. Eli's supposed to be this amazing attorney, and we've now seen him start off episodes by failing to win an argument with an airport security guy, a tow-truck guy, and a saleswoman. When he stops by the hospital to see his brother next week, is he going to be verbally thwarted by a candy-striper?

Nate: "That'll teach you not to pay retail." Heh. The brothers are on the phone, with Eli curled up in a blanket on the couch. Eli tells Nate he misses Taylor, and wonders if maybe he did the wrong thing. Nate: "You did do the wrong thing, buttwipe!" Hee. I think Nate might be my favorite character now, although the idea that the cute doctor is still single is pretty ridiculous. But it's not like eligible straight men are hard to come by, am I right, ladies of San Francisco? Eli eats popcorn as he says that Taylor would end up miserable with him, but Nate rightly points out that that should be her decision. He advises him to get Taylor back before he becomes even more pathetic, and goes on that Eli is the worst bachelor ever. "Instead of hooking up with old girlfriends, of which we know there's not many, you break out the microwave popcorn, and you spend your nights in bed watching reruns of TV movies on the WE Network!" HA! That's characterization you can sink your teeth into. And more importantly, laugh at. Needless to say, Eli is doing exactly what Nate said, except for the part where he's on the couch, a difference of which he's quick to inform Nate. Nate says he's got to get some sleep, and then we hear a deeper intonation of "Help me, Stone." Eli first thinks it's Nate, but when Nate hangs up, he hears the voice again, and warily turns toward the TV to see a close-up of a thirtysomething man repeating, "Help me, Stone." If this is the best WE has to offer, I think they need a shakeup among their network execs. ["They can start by bringing back the Felicity reruns like I've bitched about a hundred times." -- Sars] After the remote fails him, Eli runs over to the cabinet and turns off the TV, but when he looks to his right, the guy is there in his living room, and we see that he's wearing a hospital gown as he repeats his entreaty. After a little more of this, he disappears, and Eli starts to relax, but then, in a horror-movie-esque camera setup, when we pan around Eli, we see the guy standing on his right again, causing Eli to squeal like a little girl. As if Nate needed any help proving his point.

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Eli Stone




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