Quantum paces in his cavern. Does wardrobe keep a "sweat-stained" desert uniform shirt around for episodes such as these? Or do they just allow Bakula to work himself into a lather while wearing one? Maybe he's just a really sweaty guy. I'm just wondering how real the perspiration is -- I don't think of sweaty Bakula at all. Ever. Nope. There's a flash, and we get thrown into a color scheme that was once the Sepia Tones of Cpt. Quantum's Childhood, not to be confused with the Almost But Not Quite Sepia Tones Of Bygone Days, but is now the Sepia Crap of SURAK'S FUCKING KATRA. Quantum spins around in the Sepia Crap and looks at the pillars and caverns. He sees explosions in the distance. I was almost afraid that Daniels was going to show up and start pissing me off, but no, instead I get SURAK'S FUCKING KATRA being all wise and shit and telling Quantum about Vulcan history. SURAK'S FUCKING KATRA has transported Quantum back to a time known as "The Awakening," which was about eighteen hundred years ago. SURAK'S FUCKING KATRA informs Quantum that he is indeed the Chosen One or the Emissary or the Second Coming or the Messiah or whatever, despite his antipathy toward Vulcans. "My people have strayed and someone must restore them to The Path," SURAK'S FUCKING KATRA says. I can't believe this. I just can't believe this. Someone needs to yank this shit out of Quantum, who is as unworthy a vessel as ever there was. "You got the wrong man," Quantum says, and for once I agree with him. "Sorry, Captain, there's an Earth expression: we're stuck with each other," SURAK'S FUCKING KATRA says. "Don't fight what's been given to you. Open your mind and your heart and The Way will become clear." I'm assuming it's "The Way" and not "the way," because whenever there's a way in these things it's always "The Way" and "The Path." So, can we expect that Quantum will start drooling hysterically and seeing SURAK'S FUCKING KATRA in a Hawaiian shirt? No? Pity.
Episode Report CardKeckler: C | 338 USERS: C+
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