Episode Report Card
Keckler: C- | Grade It Now!
Girls Gone Green

Lime wanders into Engineering in order to play with her hair and distract people with her dinners and the mystical dream music that's following her. Lime thanks Kelby for his kindness in helping her "find the Mess Hall" that morning, and rubs up against the engines. Kelby, entranced, agrees to show her around. Female engineers, disgusted, proceed with their work. Keckler, drunk, keeps drinking.

Sickbay. Hoshi strides in, needing help for a headache. Phlox staggers over to her -- did something happen to Billingsley or is this pronounced limp part of his role tonight? -- and scans her. Phlox says another female officer was in there with a headache a few minutes ago but she was fine, just as Hoshi is. Hoshi assumes it's stress. "There's plenty of that going around," Phlox says. "Or it could be our new passengers," Hoshi ventures. Phlox doesn't see the connection. Hoshi shrugs and says she's not used to seeing "guys" trip over themselves like that. "Oh, just a little healthy sexual energy -- helps keep the blood pumping," Phlox tosses off. "If you ask me, it's pumping a little too hard," Hoshi retorts. Phlox is surprised she's the jealous type, and primes a hypospray with some Excedrin. Then he falls down. Hoshi rushes to his side. Phlox props himself on his knees and thinks he must be nearing a sleep cycle, but then realizes he had one a week ago.

Engineering. Trip glares at Kelby flirting with Lime, and reams him for not doing his work and for giving out intel about the warp core. Trip orders Kelby to get rid of Lime. Kelby refuses, so Trip confines him to quarters as Lime watches and smiles.

Quantum visits Chartreuse, who wriggles and pouts and plays with her hair. Quantum tries to tell Chartreuse that she's not his property, but she wiggles and pouts and kisses him. They make out for a bit until T'Pol comms that they are nearing the planet coordinates, and then they make out some more. I'm sorry, but I've seen a lot of Quantum Leaps where Bakula knew how to kiss. Here? Not so much. Maybe I can coach him.

Quantum, after exiting backwards from the turbo-lift, staggers onto the Bridge. Reed recommends a tactical alert in case it's a trap. T'Pol says they are definitely finding magnesite readings and then asks if Quantum is all right, since he's wandering around the Bridge furrowing at furniture. T'Pol picks up an energy reading above them, but can't tell if it's a ship because of some highly-ionized cloud layer. Ooh! Ooh! Maybe they're about to discover the Cloud Minders! If they're really clever, they can work in a reference to EVERY TOS episode before the end of the season. A ship of unknown configuration appears and fires. Since the unknown ship has such minor guns, there's barely any damage to Enterprise. Reed smirks that the ship could shoot at them all day and they'd barely sustain a scratch. Can we try that? I mean, just to test the theory? Please? You owe me! "Phase cannons," Quantum orders, all sweaty-faced and horny and just needing to have stuff come shooting out of his big...ship. Reed is surprised at the bloodlust. "A phase cannon hit will destroy them," T'Pol ventures. "Which means they won't be shooting at us any more," Quantum says, slumping sullenly into his chair. T'Pol thinks they should just withdraw. Quantum doesn't, and orders Reed to target them. Reed hesitates and then refuses. Woo-hoo! Can I get a mutiny over here? Quantum staggers to Reed's comm to fire on the ship himself. I'll bet he doesn't even know what button to push. May-Kelly announces that the ship is moving off of its own accord. Quantum glowers.

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