Somewhere in the mountains of Brazil, Ensign Hoshi Sato puts her students through their alien linguistics paces. "It's Klingon language camp, just like in Trekkies!" Mathra shrieks. Except it's not, because they don't know about the Klingon language yet. Cpt. Quantum beckons his Communications Officer away from her students. He's big into beckoning, isn't he? First Phlox, now Sato. It's good to be the Captain. Sato argues that she still has three weeks left with her students and can't just up and leave with only two weeks before exams. "There's gotta be someone else who can cover for you," Cpt. Quantum tells her. "If there was someone else who could do what I do, you wouldn't be so eager to have me on your starship," Hoshi tells him pertly. I guess an ego is a prereq in Starfleet? Aw, but who am I trying to kid? I like her sass already. Cpt. Quantum tells her he could order her back. "I'm on leave from Starfleet, remember?" Hoshi tells him. "You would have to forcibly recall me, which would require a reprimand, which would disqualify me from serving on an active vessel." So there! Cpt. Quantum tells her he needs someone with her ear. "Well, if that's all you need," Hoshi says, unclipping her auditory canal from her cranium and handing it to him, "then take it." Okay, not really, but admit it, it's not that farfetched in the world of Star Trek. Hoshi tells him he can have her ear in three weeks when she's done with her students. Cpt. Quantum holds up a speaker smaller than the palm of his hand. The mini-speaker emits some words in Klingon. "Wh-what's that?" Hoshi asks, starting to salivate. Cpt. Quantum tells her it's a sample of the Klingon language from the Vulcan linguistic database. "I thought you said the Vulcans were opposed to this," Hoshi says, her ears still fixed on the little speaker. "They are, but we agreed to make a few compromises," Cpt. Quantum tells her. Hoshi asks what he knows of the Klingons. "Not much," Cpt. Quantum says. "An empire of warriors with 80 poly-guttural dialects constructed on adaptive syntax." "Turn it up," Hoshi insists. Cpt. Quantum hands over the little speaker: "Think of it, you'd be the first human to talk to these people. Do you really want someone else to do it?" Hoshi fixes him with a look and smiles. Captain Quantum's Law #118: When in doubt, resort to flattery and bribery.
Episode Report CardKeckler: B+ | 301 USERS: C+
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