MONDO EXTRAS

The group beams down to a grassy area, where male-female couples stroll about in what look like Mylar bathing suits for the women and high school wrestling unitards for the men. Comfy! Oh, but wait 'til you get a load of what our little horny band is wearing: Quark looks like a European kid at Disneyworld, with his aqua-patterned short-sleeved shirt with lime green trim that distressingly matches his lime green culottes, and flip-floppy lime green mandals (I can't get behind men wearing sandals, I just can't). I can excuse his get-up, though, because Ferengis always dress bizarrely and colorfully. Bashir, however, with his purple velour (my god, who wears velour to a beach?) tank top that has a horizontal blue strip just below his nippular area and contrives to make him appear more famine-stricken than usual, and his brick red, black, and army green Zoobaz should really know better! I mean, did he learn nothing from "Our Man Bashir"? By the way, I LOVED that episode -- it was so much fun and was ripping on Bond before Austin Powers came along. Dax is wearing a dark green, purple, and cobalt blue tank suit with a dark purple shiny sarong wrapped around her hips. Ugh -- it makes me feel hot and sweaty (and not in a jawaharlal way, either.) Is it that outer space people are congenitally unable to dress themselves without looking like a fabric store threw up on them, or do we actually evolve beyond plain white cotton in the future? Leeta, by comparison to the rest of the circus, looks fairly normal (for her) in a pink tank suit and a matching flowered sarong. Worf, of course and thankfully, is still in his uniform. "Oh, I can't believe we made it!" Leeta creels, spinning around like she's about to change into Wonder Woman. Either that or the hills really are alive with the sound of music. Aaand I take back my kind words about Leeta's outfit. It doesn't appear to be a simple suit and sarong combo at all -- in fact, I think it's all one outfit where the bubblegum pink tank part (which I now see has a big circular cut out of the middle) is sewn inextricably into the looped up floral skirt thing with all these unnecessary gathers and tucks and resembles nothing more than a nursery valance. I've been reading a lot of Go Fug Yourself these days -- can you tell? Love those girls.