Tri'Progeny bawls out his mother for tattling on him to Quantum. They argue. T'Plucks-No-More-Forever kvetches that Tri'Progeny is letting his human side get the better of him. "You know NOTHING about being human," Tri'Progeny bores me. But can we just discuss how T'Pruneface looks exactly like Katie Couric when she went to Saudi Arabia and wasn't allowed to use her special "Katie Lighting," and we could see that her skin made the Rocky Mountains look like chiffon velvet? Tri'Progeny comments, "Maybe you'd be concerned if Vulcan was in danger and not Earth!" Well, Happy Fucking Mother's Day!
Tri'Progeny tells Perma-Furrow and the rest of his commanding crew that the crew of Futureprise has to be the ones to speak with Degra and meet with the Xindi of the Round Table, and they're going to steal Presenterprise's injectors to make it so. Perma-Furrow doesn't like that idea. "My father's a resourceful engineer -- he'll be able to fabricate new injectors," Tri'Progency states. I didn't know Trip was so talented in the medium of thin air. "You're asking me to betray Jonathan Archer!" Perma-Furrow whines. You know, if only these Futureprisers weren't all so wooden and cold in their approach to the lines, I might have felt something with that line, but as it is? I just feel the urge to throw my laptop at the television -- just to have something to get upset about. Tri'Progeny delivers a speech insisting that they follow his plan. I wonder if Quantum ever worked as a milkman. Because Tri'Progeny sure as hell got his Not Really That Stirring Speech Delivery traits from SOME-one.
Trip and T'Pol fiddle with stuff. On the ship, not each other. Trip wonders if T'Pol's had any mother-son talks with Tri'Progeny. You know, I was kind of hoping Tri'Progeny was old enough to already know about the warbirds and the bees. As T'Pol tries hard not to vomit a little in her mouth, Trip goes on about them getting married in a traditional Vulcan ceremony: "It's going to take me weeks to learn to pronounce the vows. You know where we're going to have our honeymoon? Cargo Bay Three." Ho-ho! Big spender. "He says I'll fill it up with sand that we dug up from a passing asteroid. I'm even supposed to [high-pitched giggle] fabricate a palm tree," Trip blathers. At first when he mentioned filling it up with sand, I was all "Aw, that's sweet -- like her homeworld," but when he mentioned the palm tree I was back to being confused again. Did he make coconut phones too? And did T'Pol wonder why? T'Pol really doesn't want to talk about any of this, and Trip can't believe she's not curious about figuring out how they ended up together. Is he really that dumb or am I losing it? I mean, it doesn't take such a leap of the imagination to realize where their Neural Node Nudging could naturally take them -- especially if they were stranded out of their own time and actually forced to procreate. T'Pol refuses to get drawn into this discussion. Trip insists that under the "right circumstances" T'Pol could have feelings for him: "Mebbe you have them alreddy." "I should've known this was a mistake," T'Pol grinds her teeth. "What?" Trip asks. "Exploring human sexuality with you," T'Pol says, standing with her back against the wall, dinners jutted out, so he can explore her Vulcan sexuality. T'Pol rants about Trip being unable to leave their relationship in the bedroom. "Y'know, all the other wimmin on the ship must be taken, because I can't imagine enny other reason why I wulda married ennywun as stubbern as yew!" Trip decides. Oh, pull her pigtails, rub mud in her face, put a worm down her back, and be DONE with it, because I'm so not buying this Maddie Hayes-David Addison relationship! Trip storms out, saying he's off to help Rostov.