Episode Report Card
Keckler: C- | 1 USERS: A+
Back to the Furrow

Trip and T'Pol fiddle with stuff. On the ship, not each other. Trip wonders if T'Pol's had any mother-son talks with Tri'Progeny. You know, I was kind of hoping Tri'Progeny was old enough to already know about the warbirds and the bees. As T'Pol tries hard not to vomit a little in her mouth, Trip goes on about them getting married in a traditional Vulcan ceremony: "It's going to take me weeks to learn to pronounce the vows. You know where we're going to have our honeymoon? Cargo Bay Three." Ho-ho! Big spender. "He says I'll fill it up with sand that we dug up from a passing asteroid. I'm even supposed to [high-pitched giggle] fabricate a palm tree," Trip blathers. At first when he mentioned filling it up with sand, I was all "Aw, that's sweet -- like her homeworld," but when he mentioned the palm tree I was back to being confused again. Did he make coconut phones too? And did T'Pol wonder why? T'Pol really doesn't want to talk about any of this, and Trip can't believe she's not curious about figuring out how they ended up together. Is he really that dumb or am I losing it? I mean, it doesn't take such a leap of the imagination to realize where their Neural Node Nudging could naturally take them -- especially if they were stranded out of their own time and actually forced to procreate. T'Pol refuses to get drawn into this discussion. Trip insists that under the "right circumstances" T'Pol could have feelings for him: "Mebbe you have them alreddy." "I should've known this was a mistake," T'Pol grinds her teeth. "What?" Trip asks. "Exploring human sexuality with you," T'Pol says, standing with her back against the wall, dinners jutted out, so he can explore her Vulcan sexuality. T'Pol rants about Trip being unable to leave their relationship in the bedroom. "Y'know, all the other wimmin on the ship must be taken, because I can't imagine enny other reason why I wulda married ennywun as stubbern as yew!" Trip decides. Oh, pull her pigtails, rub mud in her face, put a worm down her back, and be DONE with it, because I'm so not buying this Maddie Hayes-David Addison relationship! Trip storms out, saying he's off to help Rostov.

Tri'Progeny and crew steal injectors. Trip surprises them and doesn't get what's going on. There's lots of yelling. Trip finally drops the father card and says meaningfully, "Take some advice from your old man." Yes? "Y'all might end up killing us, which means none of you will ever exist"? Oh, wait, or: "Never a borrower nor a lender be"? No, no, I know: "Keep your nose clean and mind your Ps and Qs"? "You don't wanna dew this!" is actually Trip's fatherly advice. Color me underwhelmed, tinged with starting to sympathize with Futureprise if they had these role models to "inspire" them. "I'm sorry," Tri'Progeny says, and shoots his father. It was on "stun," I assume; otherwise Tri'Progeny's arm would have started disappearing in the Polaroid.

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