A kinder, gentler Quantum returns this week to deal with a wilder, crazier T'Pol as they investigate a drifting Vulcan ship in the Expanse. Once aboard the drifting Vulcan ship, T'Pol shows significant signs of losing her Vulcan mind and actually seems to sympathize with the warty Vulcombies the away team find eating pieces of the hull and preferring dark corners. Back on the ship of non-crazies, Trip and May-All-Bets-Are-Off go to mine some righteous Trellium-D but little do they know that they are signing T'Pol's death certificate and emailing it back home.
Right off I'm going to take a stand to say that I could have really, really liked this episode. COULD HAVE. If only the Poor, Stifled Writers hadn't blown their Emotional Vulcan loads in "The Seventh," "Stigma," "Fusion," "Fallen Hero," and a little in "The Expanse." It would have been much more compelling and meaningful if they could've held off on Tremulous T'Pol until now. Maybe that's Jolene's fault, or maybe it's the director's fault for allowing it to be Jolene's fault, but if only. If only. However, all that aside, I did sorta like this episode for many other reasons. In fact, I'm willing to go waaaaay out on my Bitch Limb and say that it's my favorite episode of this season. Yet I'm still Keckler, and I'm still going to drink gallons and I'm still going to complain throughout this viewing. You wouldn't want it any other way, would you?
"It's Wednesday and it's time for [me]"? What the hell is that all about anyway, UPN?
Quantum carries a frothy-mouthed T'Pol and shouts, "She's coming to!" to Phlox. They get her on an examination table and strap her in as she thrashes and sounds primal scream after primal scream. This puts me in mind of a Keckler Family story. As a teenager, my older sister used to get so irritated by my mother that she told her she "just wanted to scream." My mother, being the scientific woman she is, told her to go ahead -- just don't do it in the house. After that, every so often, my mother and sister would be engaged in a "discussion" and eventually something would set my sister off. Without another word, she would stomp away from my mother, throw open the door, and treat our neighbors to her pent-up issues. T'Pol reaches up and tries to choke Quantum, shrieking that she's going to kill him. You go, girl!
Here's an alternative song: It's very clear my hate is here to stay. Not for a year forever and four more seasons.
Phlox scans T'Pol -- togged as the Viagra (tm Geo Gal) Veloured Vulcan tonight -- and says he's not sure if he can reverse the damage. He starts to hypospray her, but T'Pol thrashes around some more, insisting that he's trying to kill her. "Murderers! Get away! Noooooooo!" T'Pol screams, thrashing her head from side to side on that last syllable. Quantum grasps T'Pol by the forehead, forcing her to stop wriggling, and Phlox successfully hyposprays her. She continues to freak out. "What's interesting is that's exactly what I have to do to you every Wednesday night," the Evil Dr. Mathra notes. Finally, T'Pol calms down and Phlox slides her into the SCAT, while I start to labor under the impression that we've stepped into a bird sanctuary. Seriously, did anyone else notice that the sound guys and gals picked that precise moment to pump up the volume on all of Phlox's creatures? Maybe they're experiencing sympathy crazies.