Keckler: I can't believe that after four years of serving together and getting attacked, this is the first we're hearing of her black belt.
Evil Dr. Mathra: I can -- this show sucks.

Hoshi says she got a bad conduct discharge, but she ended up on Enterprise because Starfleet needed linguist specialists so badly, they didn't care that she assaulted a superior officer. It might be cool to think that underneath all that first-season squealing and screaming, Hoshi might have a unpredictable violent streak that might cause her to suddenly lash out at Quantum and toss him right on his furrows, sending him into a permanent vegetative state, but, well, there's all that first-season squealing and screaming. Again, I appreciate that they are trying to flesh out these characters and give them depth, but it's kind of stupid to make that fleshy depth incongruous to what we already know. It'd be like Trip suddenly announcing he's from Canada. Or finding out that Reed was a life coach before he joined up. Or that people can actually see Mayweather. Sigh. And you ask why I don't live here? Honey, I think you're really weird.

Sickbay. Phlox says they're dealing with a highly contagious silicon-based virus. This is a big deal because the planet they were exploring was Class-M and all signs of life should have been carbon-based. Smack! -- of course! I don't know. Whenever I hear that something is carbon-based, I think it's a bad thing until my husband reminds me that's what we are. I really shouldn't be recapping this show, should I? Phlox can't find anything similar to the E. Fauxli virus in the Denobulan database, but postulates that at the going rate, Hoshi and Trip will be dead in five hours. Quantum switches his Concerned Furrow with his Concerned and Now Predicting Grief Furrow. It didn't seem like much was happening, so I turned it off and went to grab another beer. Seems like every time you turn around there's another hard luck story that you're gonna hear.