MONDO EXTRAS

Kirk drops to his knees and starts picking up pieces of plastic. "What's he doing now?" Bones asks. "Diamonds, the hardest known substance. Impelled by sufficient force, they would make formidable projectiles," Spock explains. "What force?" Bones demands. Well, Kirk could poke one into his ass, eat some of your whisky and beans, aim himself at RuGorn, and just let Nature take its course. "Recall your basic chemistry, Doctor, gunpowder," Spock tells him. Oh. Fine, but I still think my way's more inventive. If he can find powdered milk and Kraft Macaroni and Cheese, I see no reason why he can't find whisky and beans lying around. RuGorn threatenssss Kirk some more over the recorder-translator, but Kirk chooses to ignore him. RuGorn's mouth continues to move slightly, even though he's stopped talking. I guess wearing a head-to-toe balaclava doesn't give you much protection from bad overdubbing. Kirk loads up his rain stick with the powdered cheese and diamonds and, in the middle of limping across the rocks, spies some black stuff in the rocks. He sticks that in as well. "Coal," Spock tells us. Painstakingly, Kirk assembles and loads his cannon. RuGorn grrisses nearer. "Can he do it?" Bones wonders. "If he has the time, Doctor. If he has the time," Spock answers. Must you repeat every line? MUST you repeat EVERY LINE? Kirk bangs his recorder-translator against the coal. A wisp of smoke appears on some bark. Kirk blows. On the wisp of smoke. And in general. Kirk sees RuGorn grrissing a few yards away and closing in, so he points the rain stick and slaps the smoking bark against the outside of the rain stick. It explodes. Huh? Yeah, well, in science fiction, I guess it's enough if they get it half right.

RuGorn has been staggering down the catwalk this whole episode so, at this point, it's pretty hard to tell if he's actually been hurt. With the report, Kirk throws himself back on the rocks and takes note of RuGorn, who is now lying on the ground. This being death number two, it is now safe and advisable for Kirk to scrabble over and pick up RuGorn's weapon. He holds it above the weakly grrissing RuGorn. But then he reconsiders. "No, I won't kill you," Kirk tells him. "Maybe you thought you were protecting yourself when you attacked the outpost." Kirk stands up and limps away. "No, I won't kill him -- do you hear? You'll have to get your entertainment some...place else!" Kirk shouts to the sky. RuGorn vanishes from the ground. You knew he couldn't die -- they made him into a stuffed animal, after all.