MONDO EXTRAS

Bridge. Sulu smugs that they're closing in on the alien ship. I'd like to mention here that because this episode was cheaper than Chinette plates at a Princess Caroline wedding of your choice, we never get to see any visual of the alien ship. A crewman reports that if you look out the window on the right side of the ship, you can see an unknown solar system coming up. However, the alien vessel is not going towards it. Uhura reports that they're being scanned by the solar system on an unusual wavelength. Nothing happens for a few seconds until Sulu reports that the alien ship slows to a complete stop. "He may be turning to fight!" Kirk salivates. Spock gives him A Look. Sulu contradicts his captain and says the ship is just sitting dead. He's also a sitting duck for a bloodthirsty captain who would shoot first and ask questions later. "Then we've got him!" Kirk crows, "Go to Red Alert [wait, I thought that whole 'this is not a drill' stuff was because they were already on Red Alert!?], then prepare to fire phaser banks!" Kirk gives more orders, and Sulu counts down their approach to the alien ship. Just before they reach firing range of the alien ship, Enteprise is forced to a complete stop. "From Warp Eight -- have you lost your mind?" Kirk says to Sulu when he reports that they're at a standstill. "Same as the alien, Captain," Spock observes. Kirk gives Spock a look like he never realized that. What a complete mental lightweight! No, I take that back -- make it "liteweight," because he's so dumb, he doesn't deserve the good spelling! Kirk demands a report from Scotty. "We're dead, Captain. Locked up. Frozen tight. All propulsion systems read zero," Scotty says. Well, you can't get any clearer than that. All other ship systems report normal; they just can't go forward. I assume they can't go backward either, or side-to-side. And doing the hokey-pokey is pretty much out of the question. Spock reports that they are being held in place by the unknown solar system. "This far out -- that's impossible!" Kirk scoffs. "We are being held," Spock repeats. Hey now, why is it impossible if they are near an unknown solar system? If it's "unknown," isn't it possible it could be populated by beings so advanced that holding a ship in place thousands of parsecs from their system could be as easy as picking their noses? Assuming they have stuff to pick. Or noses.