MONDO EXTRAS

Then RuGorn comes toward him, hissing like an irate teapot, and Kirk throws away his stick. Ah, there's the reason. RuGorn breaks his stick on the skeleton of tree that Kirk is crouching behind, so Kirk thinks it's a fantastic idea to leap out and fully expose himself to hand-to-claw combat with the man in the lizard costume. Maybe Kirk knows something we don't, because Polly Put The Kettle On here moves like a sumo wrestler fighting his way through a jar of fruits of the forest confiture. RuGorn lurches toward Kirk and -- dude, get a load of his leather fingerless gloves! And kneepads! RuGorn is wearing KNEEPADS! I guess that sort of goes along with the Samantha ensemble. Kirk karate-chops RuGorn a few times, but nothing happens. Look at me. I'm so surprised. Kirk tries to kick RuGorn, but RuGorn grabs his leg and flings him onto some Styrofoam rocks. This slowly goes on for so long that I take the time to admire RuGorn's sparkly silver eyes -- they look like mini disco balls. I wonder if he has light spots dancing around in his brain. That could get trippy, and also minorly distracting. RuGorn gets Kirk in a clinch. See, this is where I think he should bite him, but he doesn't! I need to get in the ring with RuGorn and coach him. They float like a butterfly and sting like a bee for a bit until Kirk smacks his palms on the broad reptilian head. RuGorn grr-hisses in "pain" and releases Kirk, who runs off up Vasquez Rock. I think all Kirk really managed to do was shift the headdress slightly, and the guy inside couldn't quite see out of those bug eyes anymore. But soft! Kirk spies some foam rocks neatly lined up in a row! He makes a big show of hefting one above his head and hurls it down at RuGorn. It bounces Styrofoamly off RuGorn's shimmery dress, and RuGorn decides to show that anything Kirk can do, he can do better. He grr-hisses over to a piece of foam the size of a dinosaur egg and, as Kirk watches with interest, lifts it over his head and tosses it up at Kirk. Kirk starts to run the other way. Somewhere between the two camera shots, the boulder completely changes its trajectory in mid-air in order to barely miss pulverizing Kirk. It must have been one of those heat-seeking boulders. Either that, or RuGorn should be pitching in the majors. Kirk scampers for cover. RuGorn grr-hisses.