MONDO EXTRAS

As a concept, Star Base Dental actually sounded kind of cool. A nice way to take your mind off that long needle primed with Novocain the dentist hides behind his back. But as a reality, it sucked the fuzzy end of a lollypop (tm Marilyn Monroe). Dr. Star Base hooks up some flashing lights -- which, combined with Whip-Its, could make his patients have seizures, I'm certain -- props up a few cardboard cut-outs, slaps his staff into uniforms, and calls it a Star Base? I don't think so. I was also disappointed with the lack of commitment to his theme. I saw some Star Wars stuff mixed in with the Trek-a-phernalia. Jeez, he even got the reason for James Doohan's missing finger wrong. "A gardening accident," Dr. Star Base says. Um, no -- try WWII. If you're going to be weird, do it right. And I'll tell you what, that guy's not putting his hands in my mouth after I heard him and his wife tell Denise Crosby that dressing up as different characters "helps" their relationship. Ecch. Did you get a load of their poor kids, who just sat through the whole thing in their ST uniforms and didn't say a word? I think I see a few sessions with Counselor Troi in their futures.

Also interesting -- and by "interesting," I mean "pathetic" -- was Denise Crosby taking us to her garage full of fan memorabilia. She was on the show for what, a year? Granted, she managed to be in the best episode ever, but what's she done since then? Pet Sematary and Pumpkin Man. I'm not even going to go into the framed needlepoint, because what really seared my eyes like lumps of cheap ahi tuna were the charcoal, oil, and ink renditions of Tasha Yar and Data. In flagrante delicto. Detailed renditions, people.

When it came to The Powers That Be, the late Gene Roddenberry was only in evidence in clips from the first ST convention in 1972, and Rick Berman was non-existent. However, from what little we saw of Brannon Braga talking about the unsolicited submissions he gets from fans, I firmly relegate him to the putz category. He was two-thirds of the way to being downright nasty about these fans, offhandedly saying, "I don't have it here, I threw it out," about something that was sent in. I realize that he was talking about a handmade Klingon condom, complete with ridges, but his tone was really assy. Actor, director, or producer, you show respect for your fans, no matter what; they're the ones who got you where you are. Putz. I guess Majel Barrett could be considered one of TPTB. She had a few fairly uninteresting stories to relate and, naturally, no questions about the affair between Roddenberry and Nichelle Nichols. I always imagine Majel on the ST sets as Lwaxana Troi with her loud garments and piles of hair, ordering everyone around and having some tall, silent, bald guy following her around with her bags.