PIVEN ALERT! Ari approaches Eric and immediately asks where Vince is. They're moderately friendly with each other -- there's kind of a conspiratorial hint in the air as Ari castigates Eric over the fact that Vince has still not read the script for a movie called Matterhorn. He also seems a little desperate and curses a little. He promises Eric courtside seats in the near future if he can get Vince to read the script. Turtle approaches, and I hope the claws come out, but Ari just greets him abruptly and parts with a final demand that Vince read the script tonight. Which is so obviously not happening, but whatever. Eric is cool here, you can tell he's dealt with Ari before. And not only that, you can also tell he's as good at playing the game as he is memorizing names and faces. I [HEART] Eric. Turtle gets a little attitude about Ari, after he's safely gone, but swings quickly into some gross. "I'm on ass patrol! I got a six-pack, one of them kind of looks like Kristen." That is believable, yes, that someone would say that, but it's not gross enough, somehow. He's a little PG-ified. This whole show is a little PG-ified. I'm not saying I want one of them in the gutter outside the Viper Room -- although if it were Turtle I could handle it -- but this so far is like a Spelling version of a day in the life of DiCaprio, or as Variety described it, Hollywood reimagined as a rap video. Eric asks, as though he needed the clarification, whether Turtle is an asshole. "I'm just saying: revenge fuck." So, um, yes, Eric. Turtle also managed to obtain the knowledge from the Miutrix that she "loves to give head," and since he knows Eric "desperately" needs it, blah blah blah. Eric questions the veracity of this statement, but Turtle says that the healthy individual we're discussing only divulged this information to him after he first admitted that he loves Derek Jeter. Which, what? And secondly, I'll say right now that if all it takes is a love of Derek Jeter to...never mind. I can't think where I could possibly be going with that sentence. Turtle's driving again, I guess.