Some girl comes up to Drama, who's holding the biggest fucking canister of power-up ripped-fuel protein steroid powder I've ever seen. He's all, "Hi there, sweetheart," because he obviously has experience trolling for babes at gyms, vitamin shows, and World's Strongest Man contests, and she's like, "Oh sorry, I thought you were someone else," and it's another blow to Drama, blah blah blah, and then she runs away. How very "first or second episode" of you, Entourage. Turtle's fighting with some chick that works there and she's basically telling him to fuck off because he was supposed to get her some weed two days ago. She has a weird accent like maybe she's Australian or had a stroke or something. Then he tells her that -- work with me here -- THE WHOLE TOWN IS DRY (meaning Los Angeles, see?) and there is NO POT IN THIS WORLD. She goes back to reading her magazine -- well, actually, looking at the pictures. All of a sudden she goes from Madonna-British to Ginger Spice-British as she all but licks a picture of...UGGS. I almost cry for this fucking show every week, I really do. Because I think you can get Uggs at Walgreens now? But anyway he's all, you know Turtle can hook you up, baby so Turtle calls Shauna to get the Uggs hookup for free and she's all, "Of course, because those haven't been cool for a year," and he's impressed and asks if she has a weed guy because THERE'S JUST NO POT ANYWHERE IN THE CITY OR THE WORLD. And I'm like, dude? It's Debi Mazar. She's got a guy that'll replace your blood with cherry 7-Up and make it look like an accident. There's a very "woke up in a tub of ice with a Post-it saying call 911" vibe about Debi sometimes.
Episode Report CardJacob Clifton: B- | 1340 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT