A loud knock on Abby's door rouses Carter from sleep. Abby is gone; the noise persists. Groggily, he staggers to the front door, silently wondering how on Earth the peasants manage without butlers. He opens the door to see a crazy, depressed woman with a lousy blond dye job. No, not Abby. Maggie. Sally Field has gone and dyed her hair this horrible blondish-red color. She looks like a Wal-Mart greeter. "Is Abby home?" she asks tiredly. "Um, no, no, she went to work," yawns Carter. Maggie can't believe that her daughter could work in a time of crisis like this.

Abby and Weaver treat a college kid on drugs whose two oaf friends are stoned and laughing at him. He took crystal meth. PSA Boy hallucinates that he's having a heart attack, while his Afterschool Special buddies taunt him more. Kerry steps aside and lets a priest in a lab coat deliver her lines about the perils of drugs, just so we can be as literal as possible about the preaching. But these fine young men don't care. They're so stoned, they actually have bruises on their bodies from the rocks. "Ha ha, don't let them give you a baboon heart," the AS buddies snort, leaving. "Please don't let me die," whines PSA Boy. "Do I need a transplant now?" Abby snorts, "Yeah -- your brain." Man. I guess grief sucks you dry of the clever. He begs Abby not to tell his parents; just as she's staunchly not caring about any of this, a commotion outside diverts her attention.

A woman, Jana, brings in her wounded son Jared. He was hit by a car and she brought him in because she thought the ambulance wasn't coming, or something. She must've heard how busy they are at the used-car lot, diagnosing dead homeless men with Chronic Stench Syndrome. Abby yells for Weaver as they put a neck collar on Jared. "Did you see the car that hit him?" she asks Jana. "It was my car. I hit him," Jana says.