ER
A Hopeless Wound

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A Hopeless Wound

Up in Surgery, Elizabeth comments on how fast the infection spreads. Edson asks how he got it, and Romano says that it could have been a cut or a scratch. Romano tells Elizabeth to take it easy. Elizabeth asks if it's just her, or if the constant commentary is "rather distracting." Edson says it's not just her. Romano says that they should just remove the infected tissue and let antibiotics and hyperbaric oxygen therapy do the rest. Elizabeth is shocked at the order, because his tissues are "necrotic soup." Mmm, soup. Romano says that his way will "give the guy a chance of a functioning leg." Ah, so Romano is taking it personally. Of course.

At Admit, the workers gossip about Nathan. Pratt wonders how he got into medical school, and Frank opines that there's a disability quota. Shut up, Frank. I have a stupid racist desk clerk quota, and you just exceeded it. Abby wonders how Nathan expects to practice, and Frank says that he wouldn't want Nathan taking out his appendix; Frank then demonstrates that it takes a very steady hand. Susan thinks Nathan has it under control. Luka reminds her that Parkinson's is a progressive disease, and wonders what Nathan will be like in ten years. Pratt says, "Could be dead." Abby adds, "Or want to be." Susan notes how "happy Abby" always looks on the bright side.

Frank sees Weaver walk in, and says that he thought she was out sick. Or directing the episode. Weaver says that she came in to help out with the apartment-fire patients. Susan thanks her for coming in, and Weaver snarks that she shouldn't have answered her phone. Frank offers her messages, but she snaps at him and then yells that she wants the air conditioning turned on because it's hot in there. Luka notes that it's freezing in there. Frank says that Halloween is the "biggest holiday of the year for her kind." Pratt asks, "Lesbians?" Frank meant Wiccans, and adds that Weaver is "probably riding that crutch around like a broom." Frank, didn't I already tell you to shut up? Pratt says that all women get like that when they're going through The Change. Susan is shocked that Pratt would make such a sexist remark. Is she new? Has she met Frank? Pratt says that Weaver is having hot flashes and that she's moody. Susan says that Weaver's too young, and Pratt says that it's early onset. Abby retorts, "You've got early onset." That was a terrible comeback in an episode full of terrible comebacks. Pratt checks out Abby's ass and says, "Whatever you say, Nasty Ratched." Abby says, "It's nurse, okay? Not nasty, not naughty, not wet, and certainly not head. Just nurse." Despite her protestations that she's not "head" nurse (heh), Abby then agrees to talk to Luka on Chuny's behalf. Abby answers the radio as Nathan walks up and reports that he finished with the slit lamp. Weaver asks who Nathan is, and Pratt fills her in. Nathan explains that he's making up time for Elizabeth. Abby announces that they have to clear trauma for a "BOA with newborn hypoxia." Weaver doesn't really care what Nathan has to say, and orders him to follow her. Abby pulls on a sweater over her costume and assures Nathan that Weaver "doesn't bite...much."

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