Weaver enters Trauma Green, where a pretty eighteen-year-old blonde named Rosemary (the actress, Shoshannah Stern, is also on Boston Public this season) is being treated. Apparently, she collapsed and cracked her head. Weaver establishes that Rosemary is deaf, and begins communicating with her in sign language. "Want me to go get Lewis?" Abby asks pointedly, but softly. Weaver, without missing a beat, calmly insists that she's got this one under control. Abby looks worried, but says nothing. I like Abby this way -- professional, concerned, but above all, not beating us over the head with her misery or her total lack of chemistry with Carter. If she would tone down the fake-and-bake, she'd be in good shape. Rosemary sadly tells Weaver that it burns when she urinates and it hurts near her kidneys. "We're going to take care of you, okay?" Weaver smiles. She's projecting Weavus love onto Rosemary, I think, and it's kind of sweet but sad.
Ed Asner is here, and he's being sexist. He doesn't want a female doctor treating him because he's a big bad male doctor and he's crotchety and we're supposed to be all, "Thank God Ed Asner has returned to television," but instead we're thinking, "Why is he channeling Jack Palance?" Liz Torres, most recently of Gilmore Girls, is with him, presumably as his assistant. Chen dumps Ed off onto Carter. "I got a stethoscope older than you," Ed barks. Liz shares that some kids broke into Ed's clinic looking for drugs; she hid, but Ed tried to fight back. "They're lucky my sciatica acted up, or they'd be in traction," Ed bluffs. "They hit him on the head with a baseball bat," Liz translates. "More a bunt than a full swing," Ed corrects her. "He fell on broken glass and was unconscious for several minutes," Liz translates again. "I was assessing my wounds!" he yells. Carter wants Ed to get a head CT, but Ed doesn't think he needs it, because he's older than God and Carter's younger than any of his ties, and therefore, Ed is always right. Carter stands firm, so Ed bets him five bucks that the CT is clear. Carter accepts it and hands Ed off to Abby, who has a little boy in tow. "Do you have to pee in a cup?" the kid asks Ed. "Yes, he does," Abby nods. Ed looks put out. He doesn't like to pee in anything small enough to expose his aged, diminishing aim.
Abby leads the boy to the bathroom, and while she instructs him on the fine art of urine-sample acquisition, Chip appears in the background. He leans creepily against the wall, his eyes darting back and forth. When the kid disappears and Abby leans tiredly against the wall to wait for him, Chip picks up speed and walks nonchalantly into the restroom.