A Little Help From My Friends

Episode Report Card
Heathen: D+ | Grade It Now!
A Little Help From My Friends

Chen sends away the mathletes, thus ending yet another Tertiary Medical Nothing of the Week. Pratt begins flirting with Chen about how he was on the real teams in school, and that means he's well-hung. Chen's all, Wow, may I sniff your jock, hot stuff? And Pratt's like, Let's nail in the break room, and Chen bats her eyes as if to say, Again? And Pratt's going, There's a fire in my loins, and Chen's wordlessly promising to put it out with her tongue, and the welt on my head grows and grows as I repeatedly smash it into the television set. Gallant runs up looking for Weaver because Old Man Gilman's libido is apparently more powerful than his heart. "Coco and Captain Viagra," giggles Chen. Jerry theorizes that the crazier the woman, the hotter the sex, which means Anne Heche must be the world's best banger. Gallant wants someone from Legal to come down and help him with whatever situation has brewed. Gosh, gee, I hope they tell us what that is. A call comes through for Pratt; he answers it, then panics slightly, slams it down, and orders Chen to cover for him. "Not again! For how long? PRATT?" she shouts. But he's gone.

Weaver sits in the drug lock-up, jarringly enough curled up into something resembling the fetal position. Abby passes and spies her in there; she immediately enters. "How long have you been cramping?" Abby asks. "About an hour," Weaver says emptily. The bleeding has also increased. Abby offers to contact Sandy, but Weaver shakes her head. "She's at work," she says. "She'd want to be with you," Abby suggests. I know Weaver is Ms. Professional and she doesn't want to make a scene, but I really wish the show had made use of Sandy in this episode. Even just a little bit. Abby tries to get Weaver upstairs for a D&C, but Weaver panics, unwilling to leak news of her miscarriage throughout the hospital. "Just page me if the OB resident comes down for another consult," she says, breathing shakily. Abby pauses, then announces she's calling a doctor. Go, Abby! Weaver's in too much pain to fight her.

As Abby emerges into the hall, Carter asks if she's seen Weaver. "Yeah," Abby says. "She's on a break." Carter is about to press the issue, but he stops when he sees Ed Asner suturing his own leg with supplies the nurse set out for Carter -- forty-five minutes ago, as Liz testily notes. Carter bristles and refuses to let this continue, until he notices Gallant approaching with Coco, Felice, Dr. Martin, and a greasy mullet-tastic man. Carter knows what this means -- mullets always translate into trouble -- so he gets up and prepares to face this week's hijinks.

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