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A Shot In The Dark

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A Shot In The Dark

Susan comments that something is unbelievable, and Abby breezes in and guesses that Weaver has a boyfriend. Huh? I mean, I know she was joking, but why was that supposed to be funny? Am I supposed to think that Abby's an asshole, or that the writers are stupid? I'm blaming the writers. Carter says that only 39% of the staff has had a flu shot, and Susan says that she doesn't want massive absenteeism. Well, plus the vaccine shortage, which is never even addressed in this whole sub-D plot. Abby's had a flu shot, and Neela promises to get one that day, leaving Shane to make an excuse about how he can't get one yet because his playing arm can't be sore. His playing arm? Really? Susan wants 100% compliance by next week. Abby points out that Shane has been making lame excuses to get out of his flu shot for weeks. ["Plus, getting the flu shot gives you, like, a mild bruise. Fuck your 'playing arm,' Shane West, you douche." -- Wing Chun]

Chuny interrupts this stupid storyline by announcing that a police officer got shot and will arrive in two minutes. Carter starts preparing for the arrival, and everyone takes off to help. Shane sidles up to Abby and asks her to give him a flu shot today. Sigh. I thought we were done with this. Shane wants Abby to surprise him with the shot, because he has "a thing about needles." Abby doesn't even react to this stupidity.

A cop car pulls up as the doctors wait outside for their patient. The car nearly pulls right through the ER doors. The driver hops out and announces that the patient is Eddie Escobar, and that he "caught one in the neck." Susan opens the rear door and finds a bloody cop lying there, with another cop trying to apply pressure to the wound and comfort the patient. Susan and Neela take time out to berate the cops for failing to call a paramedic, but the cops claim that this was faster. The doctors get Eddie onto a board. Eddie tries to tell Gary, one of the cops, to take his keys and feed his dog. Eddie also wants them to find some papers in his filing cabinet. Backseat Cop assures Eddie that it will be okay, and wants Susan to join him in this reassurance, but Susan is too busy barking out orders to appease him as we crash to credits.

In the hallway, Abby examines a young girl who confesses that she threw up all over her friend's schoolwork. Abby reassures her that they get a lot of puking kids. Hey, that's Jordan from Showbiz Moms and Dads -- the one kid with a semi-normal parent! Nice to see she's still getting work. Jordan's mom (not her real mom, but her mom for this episode) arrives, and Abby says that the school sent Jordan in for vomiting and fever. Mom wants to take Jordan to see their normal doctor, but Abby tries to dissuade her. Jordan takes this opportunity to puke some more. Abby says it's probably just the stomach flu, but that they can run some tests to be sure. Mom wants to know how long that'll take, and Abby says it'll be about an hour. Mom asks for a real room, and Abby says she'll work on it as she walks off. Abby tells Sam to hook Jordan up with an IV, and Sam says she's kind of busy.

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