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Episode Report Card
Wing Chun: D | 297 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Abby Road

Marty: Off the internet.
Wing Chun: Shout-out?
Glark: [rolls eyes and shakes head]
Wing Chun: What? We sell human growth hormones on our website.
Sars: And if we don't, we should.

Finch tells him that if he gets them from the internet, there's no way of knowing what's in them, and asks if he knows to what kinds of health risks he's exposed himself. Marty argues that whatever it is, it can't be any worse than getting beaten up every day, blah blah blah short stack of pancakes. Then he switches gears and tries to wheedle her into writing him a prescription for real HGH. She tells him wearily that they're for children who have real problems, not for healthy adolescents. Marty says that he isn't healthy, and whines some more about the victimization he's suffered as a result of being short. Finch tells him that hormones wouldn't help that. Marty pouts, "Yeah? Well, being bigger will." Whatever you say, Pint-Size.

Carol bustles into Mr. Barnes's room, where Lisa is just finishing up gathering his belongings, and looks for Cetacaine. Lisa pointedly says, "I haven't used any." As Carol start to go continue her search elsewhere, Lisa stops her and asks, "Are you uncomfortable with my being here?" Carol asks, "Why would I be?" Lisa observes, "Sometimes it's hard for nurses when nurses go to med school, kind of like I switched teams or something." Mr. Barnes interrupts to say that he thinks he's going to be sick, and with a nurse's practiced ease, Lisa holds a bedpan under his mouth without turning around. Carol says it's not that, adding superfluously that she almost went to med school herself. She says that it's something else, and that it's stupid, but before she can say what it is (and much as it pains me, because I hate Carol, I agree with the poster on the forums -- and I'm sorry, but I couldn't find your post again to locate your name -- who thought that Carol's problem with Lisa was that Lisa had been there when Carol was in a very undignified position, during the delivery of her second baby), Mr. Barnes vomits up a considerable amount of blood. Carol asks Mr. Barnes whether he's had an ulcer, but he can't answer because he has to vomit up some more blood. She tells Lisa to "prep the suction" and runs out to get a doctor. Benton jogs in; Lisa tells him that she's just started a line, and adds that Mr. Barnes had some compazine, and just this second started throwing up "bright red blood." She says, "I think he came in for nausea," and Benton snaps, "You 'think'?" and Lisa says that he's not her patient. They do all the usual things doctors do when someone crashes. Lisa asks what's wrong with Mr. Barnes, and Benton says that he's bleeding out his GI tract. Ew. Late as usual, Dr. Dave strides in and asks what happened with his patient, and when he hears, asks whether they shouldn't get him up to the OR. What then happens (and I'll spare you all the minute details) is that contrary to normal procedure, Benton proceeds to operate -- specifically, to perform a laporotomy -- in the OR. Lisa looks tense, and a little dubious, but she steps out and assists.

ER

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