Abby sends Elena packing with her medication, satisfied to have bucked the system and lived to tell about it, despite the wretched karma a fake HIV scare will give her. She must figure her karma's already verging on nuclear in its negativity. Urbanus sidles up to Abby and asks if she has dinner plans. "No," she says. Pause. "Maybe that was too subtle," Urbanus says. "It wasn't too subtle," she assures him. He's crushed that her answer is still no. Aw. Except that his open adoration was kind of ooky, but still...rejection sucks. Pratt makes fun of a departing Ray's ripped t-shirt. "I met my discharge quota!" Ray says proudly. "So did I," Sam says, writing "Sam = 75" on the board and circling it proudly. Heh, that's kind of funny. You go, Sam, sticking up for the nurses. Ray wants them all to go out drinking to get over their shift from hell, but Neela hates the idea and Abby quietly refuses. Neela can't fathom how Ray has all that energy. "It's easy when the staff literally eats out of your hand," Abby cracks. She marvels that Ray finishes everything right when his shift is supposed to end. "I have an hour's worth of charting," she sighs. Susan hands out paychecks, Luka starts everyone's rounds, and a weirdly aggressive music cue starts up that makes me want to jig and start moshing all at once. We pull out of the ER and leave for another week.

And, for me, forever.

...Okay, that was deliberately melodramatic. I thought that might fit the occasional tone of the show itself. But it's not a joke: this is my final ER recap, a schedule-dictated decision that was surprisingly hard for me when you consider how this show gives me fits. After three and a quarter years, it's weird to think of not recapping it until it dies, but I just couldn't while retaining my sanity day-to-day. Thank you all so much for your support of me and my recaps; hopefully I'll live to recap another day for this site. I plan on it, anyway, as long as the lovely and talented Wing Chun will have me. ["Of course. Not even a question." -- Wing Chun] Thanks to her for trusting me with this show...and with that, I hand you off to the funny, delightful Kim. Maybe she'll win back some of the Carter lovers by finding his bloat slightly less painful to see than I do. Take care, all! And Goran V. -- now that there is no direct conflict of interest, you are free to call me at will. I can't believe this was my last episode and you were barely in it.